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Week 259 – Hobbies, Crusty Wounds And Miss Anderson’s Wasted Wednesdays.

Here we are at week 259. This is seemingly a momentous and historic week for Britain as we’re now out of The European Union.

I thought this would be a good topic for today’s posting. I could explore cause, economics, identities, the effect for future story writers and much more. But here’s the thing. I don’t give a cats cock!

I had a look to see if there was anything interesting that happened 259 years ago.

Continue reading “Week 259 – Hobbies, Crusty Wounds And Miss Anderson’s Wasted Wednesdays.”

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Week 250 – Reflection, Rumination and Making Glue From Horses

According to numerology the energy represented by the number 250 resonates with intuition and introspection.

I was not aware of this.

It also resonates with human relationships and recognizes that relationships are the glue that hold things together.

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Week 175 – Perspective, Invective and Uncharted Waters

Hello again one and each.

Another busy and interesting week at LS and, as always, a few unexpected twists and turns.

It goes without saying that we’ve had five more brilliant stories (more about those in a bit) but we’ve also had a whole host of wonderful submissions that have already filled up slots for the next few weeks.

That last line requires context – or perhaps perspective – in order to carry its full weight. A theme we’ll be touching on quite a bit over the next couple of hundred words I suspect.

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Week 169 – Romance, Realism And Spoiling The Moment

Hello there folks! Here we are at week 169.

I also see that we are close to 183 000 hits. C’moan guys, it will be brilliant to get to 200 000 as quick as possible. We could get there quicker if any of us had a kitten doing cute things or a fucking idiot singing ‘My Boy Lollipop’ at a graveside’ (Check it out on Facetube – It really does make me proud to be Scottish!

…Sarcasm is so under used these days!!!)

I think anyone who has read any of these posts will be aware that I don’t have much regard for romantic stories.

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Week 141 – Fashion, Bulimia And Elvis Is Dead.

Post 141 is upon us. It is here and now and hip and happening!!

The last time I was hip and happening was, well, never!

This may be a weird mix of ideas this week.

For some reason I was thinking of fashion and how fucked up that is. It’s an industry within an industry which has evolved incestuously. Most of the pipe-cleaners who model look as if they need a bloody good feed.

I used the line that I was bulimic but I just kept forgetting to be sick on many occasions. I think a lot of the models are anorexic and they keep forgetting to eat. They must be on some sort of dust diet.

The only reason that I thought of this was when I put on my new Bakers Whites for the first time and I realised that due to my stature I looked like an avalanche. The only good thing about this is that a big hairy dug keeps bringing me brandy. For some reason they are all called Bernard.

Continue reading “Week 141 – Fashion, Bulimia And Elvis Is Dead.”

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Week 135 – England, Monsters And Ronnie Shagging Thatcher.

It won’t be long until I’m taking the road to the long dark tunnel to nothingness. The eternal journal with uncertainty and purgatory beckons.

…I’m going to England for a Wedding at the weekend. Oh, the darkness is nothing to do with our rivalry / harmless teasing / hatred of England…It has all to do with marriage!!

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Week 130 – Feltching, Chunnelling And Klismaphilia

Week 130 – Who would have thought it? Probably most of us after Week 129!

I have to apologise for the title but its Diane’s fault!

I’d never considered that she thought that I was being mischievous with my titles until she mentioned this in last weeks post with my colourful penis inclusion.

Diane has been brilliantly literal with the images for all my postings. We, at Literally Stories and the authors consider her a total legend in doing so. So I wait with my breath baited to see what she has come up with!!! (I normally write this first, Diane edits and then inserts the image.)

This amalgamation of naughtiness has also given me my topic for this week and that is curiosity!

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Week 126 – Penny Dreadful, Bambi And Vera McBastard.

Well folks, here we are at week 126.

This number is pish and is no inspiration what-so-ever. Even saying that number bores, unless you have that weird wee whistle when you pronounce the letter ‘s’.

So I had to look elsewhere for inspiration.

Continue reading “Week 126 – Penny Dreadful, Bambi And Vera McBastard.”

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The Perfect Personification Of Religion by Hugh Cron


“You expect me to speak to the Archbishop? Your ideas are somewhat radical Father. For you to get on in your career you need to know how to play the game.”

“Radical? I don’t see it that way Your Grace. I think we could do a lot of good. We would build bridges. We could now bring together two sides once and for all. We need to do this, not just with our religions but with them all! But we can start with what we know.”

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