Author: gwencron

All Stories, General Fiction, Short Fiction, Writing

A Lone Ranger by Hugh Cron -Warning-Adult Content

gwencron

“Curry for the fourth day running. Thank fuck for Aldi and their sixty pence liver. Bit shite having it for breakfast though.”

Don ate as much as he could. His heaving was worth it as he’d finally saved enough money for a lager.

He got himself ready and walked to the pub. He hadn’t had a drink in over a month. He jingled the change in his pocket, his pals would be there but there was no way he could’ve walked in without the price of a pint.

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All Stories, Latest News, Writing

Week 268 – Experts, Express Prescriptions And Apart From A Couple Of Fuds, Does Anyone Know A Good Vampire Joke?

gwencron

Well here we are at Week 268.

A ‘conversation’ with Diane this week gave me the inspiration for this post.

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Short Fiction

Week 267 – Staple Titillation, Wondering What A Butterfly Tastes Like And Frying Tonight!

gwencron

‘Guilty Pleasure’ is a term that should never be used. If you enjoy something, be proud of it. Why should you hide what gives you pleasure? Don’t you bother about what other people think.

Although I’m not talking about child molestation, incest or human sacrifice, keep those to yourself. Our royal family do.

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All Stories, General Fiction, Humour, Short Fiction, Writing

Concealer by Hugh Cron Warning – Adult Content.

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Miss Shaw, please take a seat. I’m Bill Nixon…So you’ve filled in your new claim and you’ve stated that you walked out of your last employment. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“You do realise that you may be sanctioned and won’t receive any benefit?”

“I know.”

“Well in your own words, could you tell me what happened.”

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All Stories, Latest News, Writing

Week 266 – Eleven Stages Of Being (A Marshmallow), Respect Due To Connie Francis And Hooch Makes A Cracking Shandy.

gwencron

Here we are once again guys.

I was wondering about our physical development time line. I think it went something like:

Baby. Toddler. Kid. Teenager. Adult.

Now-a-days we have:

Baby. Toddler. Pre-School. Young child. Older child. Pre-Teen. Young teenager. Teenager. Older teenager. Young adult. Adult.

This is very apparent in attitudes, as in, it takes the fuckers a helluva lot longer to grow up.

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All Stories, General Fiction, Humour, Short Fiction, Writing

Soup by Hugh Cron – Adult Content. Strong Language.

gwencron

“What about you Dave, what’s the worst thing you’ve done?”

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All Stories, Latest News, Writing

Week 265 – Alternative Spelling, Pretending Your Name Is Keith And Two Sex Faces You Don’t Want To Visualise.

gwencron

Well here we are at Week 265.

I looked back to see if there was anything interesting historically that had happened.

I saw that the beautiful Elizabeth Taylor died in 2011.

Ronnie Raygun also initiated ‘The Star Wars’ program.

And the first use of the abbreviation OK was used in America.

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All Stories, General Fiction, Writing

Scenes From An Ayrshire Chip Shop by Hugh Cron – Adult Content

gwencron

Here son, Haggis Supper.

“Cheers.”

“I want a kebab.”

Well fuck off to the kebab shop, I’ve told you, we only do suppers.

“Some fucking shop this is.”

Do you want anything else?

“Give me a packet of Gypsy Creams.”

I’ve ran out.

“Fuck this I’m going for a Chinky!”

Well off you fuck!

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All Stories, Latest News

Week 264 – Thanks And No Thanks, A Solution That Isn’t Alcohol And Looking After Number One And Two.

gwencron

Well here we are at Week 264.

First off I need to thank Diane for her excellent post of last week. She did a grand job. And you may not know this, but she removed three thousand and forty two profanities from her original draft. I thank her on behalf of all you sensitive souls.

Continue reading “Week 264 – Thanks And No Thanks, A Solution That Isn’t Alcohol And Looking After Number One And Two.” →

All Stories, Crime/Mystery/Thriller, Horror, Short Fiction

Speak No Evil by Hugh Cron – Warning – Adult Content

gwencron

I was somewhere I had no business being, doing something that I shouldn’t, when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

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