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Week 272 – A Norwegian Hero, Assuming Wankers And A Walloper With A Door.

Well here we are at week 272. We thought it best as week 271 was last week and using that again would just be pish.

The weeks are fair flying in. We’re nearly half a year in.

It was V.E. Day this week and I’m always a bit uncomfortable with the word ‘celebration’. I think the remembrance day ideals are more to the point. How can so much loss of life be anything to celebrate? Mind you – The alternative isn’t worth thinking about!

If I’d been alive in those days, I’d probably have been an ironic conscientious objector. I wouldn’t have cared about shooting others, but I don’t think being shot at would have appealed to me.

That’s actually a shit bravado line.

But I do think there is something wrong with you if you enjoy being shot at.

My real reasons for thinking that I would have refused is two-fold. Firstly, I see absolutely no point what-so-ever in shooting at a guy who is more like me than those that decided that we had to fight. And secondly, all this shit about fighting for her in the big house doesn’t sit well. Do we really need to protect a lifestyle that is already over protected?

I’ve all the respect in the world for the forces, it is humbling to think what they do.

Although I may have issue to why they do it.

I have even more issue with those that give the orders.

The old line about history being written by winners is very true. Would the victors of any conflict have the balls to say exactly what had been? Even if they did, there would be some wee fuck in a suit crawling around a big building somewhere making sure that any revelations didn’t cause embarrassment.

When we write stories about wars, commercial fictional heroism is uplifting and gets the adrenaline flowing. But heroism that is realistic is more terrifying and heartbreaking.

I watched the film, ‘The Twelfth Man’ and there’s a line where the MC was called a hero. He stated that phrase should’ve only been used for those who’d helped him.

It’s a very interesting thought. Is being shot because you’re wearing a uniform any less or more than being shot when you help someone with a uniform?

Humanity is humanity no matter whose side you are on.

What I enjoy about this type of question is the fuckwits who assume that you have certain affiliations. This is nonsense, questions don’t make bigots, more likely, they do the opposite.

One of my favourite songs is ‘The Patriot Game’ And one of my favourite books is ‘Jig’ by Campbell Armstrong but as soon as some folks read and listen they assume that I have certain views.

It is the same sort of assumption (especially) in Scotland when you say that you don’t support Rangers Football club – A tosser’s question to that reveal is normally, ‘Are you a fucking Pape?’

To disagree with one thing doesn’t necessarily make you anything else.

Okay, onto this week’s stories.

Four newbies and our most prolific writer were showcased over the past five days.

To all the newsters we welcome them, hope they fun on the site and that they continue to send us in their work.

Our topics this week include; A dampner, a conversation, a gathering, a journey and a doll.

As always our initial comments follow.

 

First up on Monday was Jedrzej Kierys with ‘On This Warm July.

‘A very visible piece of character writing. She was pretty unlikeable.’

‘Good style. It rattled along nicely.’

‘You could feel the swagger and teenage bravado.’

 

The Luck Sucker‘ was next up.

The writer was Antaeus.

‘I wish I spread bad luck – I don’t, I keep it all to myself.’

‘This is a really good idea beautifully told.’

‘Brilliant pace to this.’

 

There’s no introduction needed for Mr Tom Sheehan.

He broke the back of the week with the playfully titled, ‘Shindig, Shivaree And Hellfortootin’ Honeymoon Time.

‘Excellent pace!’

‘A lot of fun.’

‘I bet Tom had a smile on his face whilst he was writing this.’

 

The stories as well as the days kept coming.

Rylan Shafer was next up with ‘New Strangers‘.

‘I got the message, the embarrassment and the awkwardness.’

‘A relevant topic.’

‘This felt quite realistic.’

 

And we finished off with ‘Plastic Breath.’

Alfredo Salvatore Arcilesi completed the week.

‘The slow build up of tension was well done.’

‘Unusual style but very effective.’

‘The mother’s ailment was of her own doing and in a way she could be blamed for her daughter’s resentment.

 

That’s us wrapped up once again.

Just the usual reminders guys, please keep the comments coming.

And why not have a go at the Sunday Re-Run. Pick an older story that you’ve enjoyed, write a spiel or an introduction for it and throw in a few questions for the writer. We’ll print exactly what you send.

To finish off, I want to tell you about a video I saw this week.

I’ve said many times before that I’m not a fan of writing prompts but this video had me curious and got my mind wandering.

It was set in Blantyre in South Lanarkshire in Scotland. Us Scots don’t do cute kittens or celebrity spotting, no we do a guy with only a pair of joggers on, walking down the middle of the road, carrying a door.

I wondered why.

The motorist who took it asked him if he’d forgot his keys.

I think it was one of two things.

Maybe he was going to a Farmers Market to buy some honey and his wife had told him that the door was *ajar.

But I find that highly unlikely as no-one can afford honey from a Farmers Market.

Or the police had just been at his house and told him if he didn’t let them in they were going for a warrant and would break down the door.

This guy thought as he was unscrewing the hinges, ‘This’ll show them.’

He’d already flushed his smack down the toilet and was feeling quite pleased with himself. He’d explain later, after a few months, to all his friends who’d listen, on how he ‘Fucked it to the Polis!’

Unfortunately, neither of those scenarios explain why he had no shirt on.

…Wait a minute, I think I’ve got it!

Third option – He’d spilt supermarket honey down his shirt and he was taking the door to ‘Cash Converters’ to pawn it as a down payment on a washing machine!!

-Yep! I’m still shit at prompts!

Hugh

*Apologies for such a terrible joke but it was the first thing that came to me!!

Sorry about the quality of the image but I know you all wanted to see it!!! dd

 

4 thoughts on “Week 272 – A Norwegian Hero, Assuming Wankers And A Walloper With A Door.”

  1. Thanks Diane,
    I should have known you wood be able to knock up a an image of the chap at the door.
    (I hate myself sometimes!!)
    Hugh

    Like

  2. A hero is an undereducated person who works two slave wage jobs to provide for children who are typically embarrassed by this person. Nobody blows this person in corporate commercials and few attend the funeral when this person dies.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Leila,
      Recognition and status in whatever form is very unfair at times.
      Recognition doesn’t matter. But it is fucking annoying when the deserving are overlooked and the able are fawned over.
      It really does piss me off when I see some royal or politician doing their bit for charity and society going wild for pictures of some daft-bitch princess feeding some poor wee kids. They have been given the means to get there safely. They have been given the aid to pass on and most importantly – They’ve been given the opportunity for a photo-shoot.
      Struggling to pay your way and feed your own somewhat limits your charitable abilities.
      Thanks as always for you commenting on this post!!
      Hugh

      Like

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