At the corner of Wisteria and Hope lives a snotty little shit named Miss Hola Americana Chic. She’s a he. She wears a velvet garter. Hola wears penny loafers with a silver dollar. She has three titties and speaks Esperanto, but she’s Greek. She’s a delegate to the UN. She’s afraid to fly. She travels by boat. She spends her weekends boar hunting. When she goes hunting, she takes an entourage of three Irish setters and a black body guard. He’s a she. He speaks Swahili and is an alcoholic.
Continue reading “Fulfillment by David Lohrey – Warning – Adult content.”Literally Reruns – Ray’s Vision by Adam West
I hopped into the Wayback machine and located this piece by one of Literally Stories founding Editors, Adam West. It is a keen look at the Cult of Personality and the usage of women somehow justified by a higher power of the user’s invention.
Continue reading “Literally Reruns – Ray’s Vision by Adam West”Week 363 – Personnel Empathy, Twenty Five For Dave Henson And Fifty For Mr Jackson.
Here we go again, another week has been and gone. I’ll be delighted to see this posting on the site as that means that I’ll be off for a week after finishing this morning.
These days off were one of those holidays that were more of a use-up than something that was planned and what is so good about them was I thought I wasn’t off for another week.
Continue reading “Week 363 – Personnel Empathy, Twenty Five For Dave Henson And Fifty For Mr Jackson.”A Currency of Serpents by David Henson
Five minutes, twenty-nine seconds for milk, bread and a few other items? Ridiculous. The clerk transfers the time from my corporate God Assurance card to the store’s account. “Here you are, Mr. Spencer.” He gives me a rattler.
I pass the diamondback between my hands a few times then raise it to eye level to complete the required time. As I give the snake back to the clerk, I hear a woman in the next booth gasp.
Continue reading “A Currency of Serpents by David Henson”I Will Gift My Dragon by LC Gutierrez
Other people’s dragons? Maybe you find your rooftop scorched and have to change your weekend plans. But when you say “MY dragon”, that’s a different story. My world was all fucked and I could no longer ignore it. Two choices: 1- Keep stumbling along, half-assing a mediocre existence, or 2 – Take control.
Continue reading “I Will Gift My Dragon by LC Gutierrez”Deep Inside Woodwards by Harrison Kim
Too sunny on the belt buckles, blinding my brown eyes. Hooking them down to the sidewalk, I take control of my hazy head, walking quick with the crowds, watching for loose wallets. I’m skinny, so I slip between pants. It’s a familiar circuit on rainy days too, under the umbrellas and inside the handbags. Hey! There’s the known mullet cut! Yes, over by the plate glass doors. That’s Ed up there, jostling just up the Hastings sidewalk, debating with Miss Jehovah Witness, holding her pamphlets.
Continue reading “Deep Inside Woodwards by Harrison Kim”The Foot of Bennachie by Michael Bloor
As Alex was walking through the university gates to the departmental staff meeting, he was thinking about Black Holes, the first photograph of which had been displayed as a news item on his ipad that morning. One of the strange-but-true properties of Black Holes was that they slowed the progress of time. There was an unlikely parallel with departmental staff meetings, with their endless discussions of staff car parking provision. Looking on the bright side, it was the last staff meeting of the Easter Term, and at the end of the term he was retiring.
Continue reading “The Foot of Bennachie by Michael Bloor”Here Lies a Man by Keith LaFountaine
1.
The child watches as the man sifts dirt into a hole. The shovel chomps through the loamy earth, and each perfunctory crunch is a reminder of the past hour: of the door buckling on its hinges. Of Pa, wrenching his hand back, pushing the child toward his half-closed bedroom door. A boot shattering the jamb. Wood slapping against the floor, clattering, the bronze knob cracking against the wall.
The man leveling his revolver, the snout belching yellow flame. Pa, twisting backward, falling, a weeping hole in his head.
Now, as the ropes chafe against his red wrists and the cold wind licks the salty sweat on his forehead, the child wonders if the man will turn that revolver on him. But he’s already digging the hole. So maybe not.
But then, what will the man do with him?
2.
Vernon mops the sweat from his brow and sticks the shovel in the turned-over soil beside the hole. In it, with a body that is twisted like a mangled salmon, is the man. A man. A human of no importance. At least, to Vernon, that is the case. To Mr. Reginald B. Farnsworth, this man is of extreme importance, insofar as he owed a certain sum. Poker, Blackjack, Craps. One of the seven deadly games.
He glances at the kid, tied to one of the nearby trees. Vernon isn’t great at guessing ages, but he can’t be older than eight or nine. His eyes are sharp, belying the doughy youth of his cheeks. Like sapphire marbles, they are. And they bore into Vernon’s chest with confusion, distaste, and hatred.
Shaking his head, Vernon turns to his pack. Pushing by the slabs of jerky, the ruffle of extra clothing, and his revolver, he finds what he is looking for: his waterskin. Pulling the top off, he sucks down a few gulps. Then, glancing at the kid again, he walks over.
“Get yer chin up,” he grumbles.
The kid assents, and Vernon dribbles some water down his throat. Then, he stoppers the skin and pushes it back into his pack.
“Are you gonna kill me?” the kid asks.
Vernon turns, staring into those chiseled sapphire eyes. Something about them lifts the hairs on his arms. Or maybe it’s just the wind. Regardless, he turns back to the shovel, grasps its wooden shaft, and gets back to work.
3.
The water serves mostly to remind the child of how dry his throat is. Now lingering, the beads of liquid tickle his parched tongue, pulling saliva from his gums – thick, treacly stuff that the child swallows without much relish.
Stars twinkle above, clear and present. He remembers the time Pa told him what stars were: or, at least, what Gramps once said about the universe. That it’s just the same stuff, recycled, turned over onto itself. And once the world ceases to exist, it will turn to the dust from whence it came, just like humans will sink into the soil.
Something about that is comforting as the child listens to the steady chunk patter of dirt being shoveled into the grave. The pile of turned-over soil is getting smaller by the minute, and the man seems determined to finish before the moon dips too low in the sky.
That means something is coming. Some revelation. Some startling honesty, rusted like dinner spoons.
4.
Vernon looks at the sky. It must be getting closer to two-in-the-morning, judging by the placement of the moon. Ideally, he wanted to be done around midnight. But the man in the grave, the man of no importance, the man who will feed Vernon’s pregnant wife back in Montana, chose to take his sweet time putting the kid to bed.
Again, he glances back at the kid. The hole is half-full. Three feet left.
“What’s your name?” he barks.
The kid doesn’t answer. Not immediately, at least. He seems to consider the biting wind. Then, with a sharp earnestness, he says, “Sam.”
“How old is you, Sam?”
“Ten.”
Vernon searches Sam’s face. He could be lying, but at the end of the day the difference between eight, nine, and ten is about as important as the man in the hole. Vernon chews on the inside of his cheek, turns, and shoves the blade into the remaining soil.
He sits in front of his work, his arms resting on his bent knees. Vernon considers the child.
“You know why your Pa’s in that hole?” Vernon asks.
“The booze?”
“Not exactly,” Vernon says, though it’s not far off either.
“The cards, then. Ma never liked the cards.”
“Where’s your Ma now?”
“Virginia. She said she wanted to be closer to Mr. Cleveland.”
“The president, huh?” Vernon asks. “Don’t know many who love him.”
“Ma doesn’t love him; she just respects him.”
Vernon picks at his pants. He swipes at the stray flecks of soil on them, then leans his head upward and sucks in the sweet air.
“Are you gonna kill me?” the kid asks.
“You don’t need to be scared.”
“I ain’t scared,” the kid snaps. “You ain’t scared me. I just wanna know.”
“Fine, you’re not scared. Why you wanna know so bad?”
“So I can know whether I gotta kill you or not.”
Vernon sighs and stands, slapping the dirt off the seat of his pants. He’s about to turn to his pack, when he hears the kid’s voice again, softer, lacking the false bluntness.
“You don’t have to do it, you know.”
He turns, and the kid’s eyes stare through him. There’s an adult honesty in his preadolescent gait. In the way his legs are crossed.
“It’s not that simple,” Vernon says.
“Do you have a wife?”
Vernon balks at the question. “That’s not important.”
“Do you have a wife?”
“Yes,” Vernon says. He places his hands on his hips. “Of what importance is that to you?”
“I’m not an idiot,” the kid says. “I know Dad was into cards. I know he owed some guy up North big money. That’s why we had to get movin’ before anybody showed up. Why we ended up down here.”
“You seem to know a lot.”
The kid doesn’t say anything back.
“Well, if you know this much, you must know I can’t keep a kid around who’s seen me in action. You understand?”
“No loose ends,” the kid replies simply.
“That’s right.”
“How much did they pay you to kill my Pa?”
Vernon lumbers toward his pack and pushes by the clothes again. Inside, he finds the revolver. Silver and shining, golden curls inlayed into the metal. He snaps the cylinder open, sees the five healthy bullets, spies the one spent cartridge.
He snaps the cylinder shut again, turns, and walks toward the kid. He is surprised, and a bit unnerved, to notice the kid is not scared. Those blue eyes remain as steady as ever. Old things, they are. From a different time. A different age.
“Does your wife know?” the kid asks.
Vernon levels the revolver, pulls back the hammer, and shoots Sam in the head. The gunshot cracks, clear as crystal, through the night sky. The trees rustle as nightbirds fly away. But then, silence returns. Or, not silence precisely, but an equilibrium, defined by the cool wind, defined by the croaking branches and the whispering leaves.
He unties the kid’s hands, trying not to get blood on his clothes. Then, he drags Sam by the legs and thrusts him into the half-full hole.
Those blue eyes stare up at him as he shifts the rest of the loose soil into the grave. And they remain burned into his mind as he tucks away his things into his pack and starts off toward the city to catch a train home.
5.
Vernon gets off at his first stop. Ohio has a peculiar scent to it. Mostly Cleveland. Like oil and gunpowder and lilies – and not necessarily in that order. He wanders the streets, weaving by panhandlers with tin cups and women in thick dresses. There’s a man over by the intersection – two blocks ahead of where he’s supposed to meet Mr. Reginald B. Farnsworth – and he’s got newspapers in his hand.
“Get ya news,” he shouts. “Get ya paper! Get ya news! Get ya paper!”
Behind him, an older man with a gallant mustache and a limp whispers to his friend, “I swear, they got silver out west. Heard it from m’ cousin, and he don’t lie ‘less he’s got a good reason.”
Two blocks on, he comes to a stout inn. He tucks his hands into his pockets and finds his buyer. Mr. Farnsworth’s portly frame bends the shape of the cushioned chair he’s seated in, and the flabs of his neck serve as a cushion for his chin. He pushes up the spectacles that run down his nose and folds the heavy paper in his hands.
Upon seeing Vernon, a smile creases the folds of his face, and he places the paper down, spreading his arms without standing.
“Mr. Wells,” Farnsworth declares. “Do sit down. I’m excited to hear about your business down south.”
Vernon sits in the chair across from Farnsworth. The hotel is a bustle of conversation, and near the front desk a bellboy helps an old woman in lavish furs to her room. Sunlight streams in. He smells lilac, followed by the acrid odor of gunpowder.
“Business went well, Mr. Farnsworth,” Vernon says, keeping his voice low. He sweeps the hotel again as he speaks, checking corners, considering windows, eyeing that bellboy. He has his hands in his pockets, after all.
“Splendid,” Farnsworth exclaims. “Your reputation precedes you, Mr. Wells. Is there a location I can send a colleague of mine?”
“Three miles outside of Oakdale,” Vernon says smoothly. “Follow the trail for half-a-mile, then turn west and march toward the clearing. Then, march east for two miles. You’ll find the site. A boy is first, three feet down, followed by his father.”
“Ah, I see there was some trouble,” Farnsworth says.
“No trouble,” Vernon lies.
“Well, I’m only paying you for the father. This wasn’t in our original agreement.”
“That’s fine,” Vernon says.
“Good. Fine. Mr. Wells, I will send one of my men down to your lovely home in Montana once my colleague confirms the site. What was the figure we agreed upon? Eight thousand?”
“Ten and a half, actually,” Vernon corrects.
“I see,” Mr. Farnsworth says. He shifts in his seat, and his body wobbles dangerously. “Ten and a half it is. Upon confirmation, of course.”
Vernon catches the words he wants to say, shoving them back down his throat like a hastily eaten meal. He nods, though Farnsworth eyes are giving him the same feeling Sam’s did.
“There’s something else you should know,” Farnsworth says. “If I find you’re lying to me, there will be no mercy. I will make an example of you. Yes?”
“You have nothing to worry about, Mr. Farnsworth,” Vernon says. “If you follow the directions I’ve given, you’ll find the site.”
“Good. Fine. Now scurry on out of here. I have a paper to read.”
Vernon does not wait for the man to repeat himself.
6.
In bed, Vernon strokes his wife’s cheek. Her belly is swollen, and she sleeps on her side now. The doctor says their baby is healthy, that he’ll see a world of love and kindness. Vernon smiles, then places his hand on the skin, feeling his son or daughter kick. Either is fine with him. He will love them regardless.
“Don’t leave for so long again, please,” Cara whispers. “I thought something awful happened this time.”
“I won’t,” Vernon agrees. And if Mr. Farnsworth holds up his end of the bargain, it’ll be a promise he keeps.
“A boy visited the house while you were gone,” Cara says.
“A boy?”
“Yes. He said his name was Sam.”
Vernon’s heart freezes in his chest. In an instant, those woods return to him. Those chiseled eyes. That stoic face.
“What did he want?”
“He asked me if I had a man. And I told him, ‘I’ve got a Winchester 94 that can do some talkin’ if you wanna go that route.’ And he said, ‘no ma’am, no ma’am, just wanted to know if the man of the house was home.’”
“Did he say who sent him?”
“I didn’t invite him in for conversation, Vern,” she says, humor sprinkled in her tone like ginger in tea.
“Yeah, ‘spose that’s fair.”
“Why?”
“Someone I did some work for,” Vernon says. “He just rubs me the wrong way.” But he doesn’t tell her what’s really on his mind. The question that lingers on his tongue.
What color was the guy’s eyes?
7.
Vernon swings the axe, splitting the firewood on the block. As he stacks the pieces, he sweeps his sweaty arm across his forehead. The air is thick, and the forest is ablaze with noise.
Still, work is work. And it passes the time.
He grabs another block of wood and places it on the stump. As he lifts the ax, he hears a whistle from somewhere behind him. Not a bird’s whistle; it doesn’t have an avian musicality.
Vernon spins, the ax blade glints in the sunlight, and a rifle cracks. His midsection bursts into a mixture of blood and gore, and fire burns as the bullet twists around his insides like a malevolent surgeon. He falls backward, knocking aside the wood he’s just painstakingly stacked, and it’s then he sees the men coming out of the forest.
Vernon isn’t surprised by how hot his blood is, but he is surprised by how it steams. How, when he tries to plug the hole, more seems to slip from the wound. He considers scrambling back to the cabin. Back to Cara. Back to the Winchester, and maybe even to a doctor, if Cara can ride out fast enough to town.
But no. They only want him. And if he goes back to her, she will be entangled in his web. So, he settles by the stump, holding his gut, and he raises a stained hand to the three men approaching.
“I did my job,” he says. His voice is weak, and his throat is as hot as beach sand.
One of the men, older, stouter, looks out at the expanse of trees, his rifle settled into the crook of his shoulder. Another, younger, leaner, watches the other side, though without the older man’s attentiveness. It’s then Vernon wonders if the man fought the Grays down south, or if he just has a fighter’s spirit in his blood.
The last man bends down, and his blue eyes are blazing with an odd delight. Vernon stares into them, and he opens his mouth to speak.
But Sam is first. “Sorry friend,” he says. “No loose ends.”
And then Sam slips the revolver from his holster, puts it to Vernon’s head, and pulls the trigger.
Image: Pixabay.com
Literally Reruns – Flanders Fields by Tobias Haglund.
Tobias Haglund is one of Literally Stories’ founding editors and was responsible for a great deal of the early work that appeared in the site. Flanders Fields appeared during the first summer of LS’s existence and hasn’t paled a shade yet. It echoes beautifully the courage and sacrifices of war.
Continue reading “Literally Reruns – Flanders Fields by Tobias Haglund.”Week 362: A Brief History of Criticism and the Glorious Girl Groups of My Unsteady Jukebox
Brief Introduction
Hugh graciously gave me three weeks off from this task. His latest inspired me to create today’s post .
A Brief History of Art Criticism
According to an ancient scroll in my possession, a splintered human-like skull of an ungodly age, found in a French cave, was none other than that of the art world’s first critic, Ug-Pierre. Ug-Pierre had shared his thoughts on the quality of Ug-Jean Luc’s (he being the first temperamental artiste) cave painting Mob, Antelope and Spears. In the challenged lingo of the prehistoric French, Ug-Pierre had opined that Ug-Jean’s effort made no use of the prehensile thumb, lacked proto-humanity and that the last hunter looked more like a pile of mammoth dung than a cave dweller. Since murder was still legal at that time, one has to wonder if Ug-Pierre was suicidal or just an uncommonly stupid cave dweller.
Fast forward several millennia, and we meet Arduth Rameses-Bey, who went to Pharaoh and claimed he could secure his highness’ legacy by building a bigger, better Sphinx. After emptying the treasury and relieving the population of thousands of its strongest members, the project was accomplished twenty years later. Unfortunately, at the grand opening, the most favored of the hundreds of Mrs. Pharaohs said, loudly, and to anyone who’d listen, that it looked more like a sphincter* than a Sphinx–and the only way to fix that was through a human sacrifice. Well, of course, someone had to die, and since that particular Mrs. Pharaoh was better connected, old Arduth Rameses-Bey (whom the aging Pharaoh owed money) was selected for the honor. Sadly, a small comet appeared and detonated over the crowd and the bigger, better Sphinx, obliterating all from history, save for the account in the ancient scroll in my possession.
(*Why yes, the ancient Egyption word was the same as ours. Hardly a coincidence on the level of the sun and moon appearing the same size because the sun is four-hundred times larger, yet four-hundred times farther away–but it rates.)
You’d be amazed by the stuff I have on my desk. Right now the only surviving entry from the hitherto unknown Shakespeare diary lies next to my Chromebook.
23 April 1601
“Dark regret hath cast a shadow on mine soul. Out offending whimsy! that caused me to teach Second Best Anne to read: ‘Wot is this “to be nor not to be” tripe, Will. Why can’t you be plain spoken like that Ben Jonson?’”
The cliche is true: “Everyone’s a critic.” But critics don’t need to be trolls. And yet some are downright nasty. The late Harold Bloom was a well respected literary critic, but the way he went to town on Stephen King after King’s inclusion in a secret writer society of some fancy stripe was flat out vicious. I used to never think much about critics, because I’ve never been the object of such in print. But nowadays, I realize the awful power of being in a place (however humble) where my word counts for something, as a yay or nay regarding the works of others. I’ve also discovered that the only thing worse than getting a rejection is sending one. I feel like I enter a room, uninvited, where someone is whistling and smiling, while I tick off the seconds before the person sees me and I say something that ends all innocent happiness.
Then again it might either concern you or confirm a suspicion to know that this so-called evaluator of other writers’ work just lit the wrong end of her cigarette and is struggling to drink coffee due to the recent installation of a device in her mouth designed to ease TMJ. Oh, no, with me submissions are not evaluated in a paneled study like those you see in movies–in this case think of a dimly lit room where the cats take turns yarking on the carpet. Still, I am certain that things are classier at both my colleagues’ work spaces.
A Brief Epiphany of the Soul
Wow! That feels better! Confession, however insincere, is good for the soul! Now I can get on with rejecting folks with the spotless heart of a sociopath! Thank you for listening!
Now For the Object of the Post
Yet it remains better to salute hard won success than it is to dwell on our own little personality issues, or say shitty stuff about the work of other people in public; so let us get on with this week’s recap of top notch tales.
This week’s authorship has a combined total of five site appearances. Yes, all the writers this week made his/her LS debut.
Victor Kreuiter opened the week with Family and Friends. This is as fine a story set on Death Row as I’ve ever read. The focus of the piece is brilliant; it proves there is much of the unexpected to still be expressed in the time honored tale of a condemned soul.
Natasha Dalley made her site debut with Suffocating Half Truths. We see a lot of pieces that attempt what Natasha accomplished beautifully. Stories that present a possibly imagined person that intrudes on a “real” person’s mind; a shadow personality who is real enough for the one who experiences, in this case, her.
Tripp Watson’s ironically titled The Devil in Detail is most definitely a case of OCD gone awry–to put it gently. What happens in the basement stays in the basement until the coast is clear. Evil fun.
Thursday saw the first appearance of Grace Larson on the site. Three Headed Monster is something that anyone who has a soul can relate to. It is the right way to present the affection we have for those much loved creatures in our lives who have horribly short life spans. Grace is young and talented, and a much better writer at her age than I was. I should hate her a little for that–instead I am grateful that the future of storytelling is in good hands.
Dead Socks Do Count by Salini Vineeth closed the classy week. This is a knowing look into the minds of children. Not all writers are able to carry the actual perceptions of childhood into adulthood. Most usually relate the current feelings they have toward an old situation–yet Salini nailed the way kids really are. Quirky and funny, I hope that everyone reading has had a peek under the lid–so to speak.
There we are, our five new authors. Let’s give each one the praise that is well earned. For maybe that will encourage each one to come back as well and often.
I close on yet another musical note, inspired by Hugh’s latest wrap, courtesy of my Unsteady Jukebox. My grandmother was a big fan of girl groups of the sixties. The recent passings of Ronnie Spector and Rosa Lee Hawkins of the Dixie Cups has put me in a nostalgic mood for those melodic ladies of yore. In closing I present my top nine girl group songs of a time that managed to get along without me. Naturally, a tenth spot is left open for suggestions.
- Soldier Boy Shirelles
- Walking in the Rain Ronettes
- People Say Dixie Cups
- My Boyfriend’s Back Angels
- The Happening Supremes
- He’s So Fine Chiffons
- Heat Wave Martha and the Vandellas
- Foolish Little Girl Shirelles
- Be My Baby Ronettes
Leila
