I’ve been fairly happy since I re-animated Wendy. She wanted to leave me to get back to her bad boys after the first time I brought her back to life. I still believe that because she owed me her life, it was OK to conk her with my baseball bat for a second re-animation. Her first death was in an accident of her own making. It’s all turned out for the best, at least for me. I had to make some sacrifices to keep the relationship going, like getting those ugly tattoos and settling for sex once a week on Wednesdays, but if you could see me, you would know that it is the best deal I could make.
A few things have really annoyed me this week and hence this inspiration. I decided to write on what annoys me most. I have a list, but will go for the doozy annoyance. I hate everything from Romance Novels to Polo-necks. I hate Gok Wan, cockatiels, most TV, Bieber, Sainsburys, South Ayrshire Council, Pizza, itchy trousers, mobiles, enthusiasm within the workplace, management, ratatouille, folks that read papers that they haven’t bought, politicians, the monarchy and sheep…To name but a few. But my biggest bug bear is adverts.
literally stories 