Week 89 – Adverts, Cramps And Protests.

typewriterA few things have really annoyed me this week and hence this inspiration. I decided to write on what annoys me most. I have a list, but will go for the doozy annoyance. I hate everything from Romance Novels to Polo-necks. I hate Gok Wan, cockatiels, most TV, Bieber, Sainsburys, South Ayrshire Council, Pizza, itchy trousers, mobiles, enthusiasm within the workplace, management, ratatouille, folks that read papers that they haven’t bought, politicians, the monarchy and sheep…To name but a few. But my biggest bug bear is adverts.

I don’t watch much TV but when I do I hate the interruptions of adverts. Most of them, I don’t even understand what they are advertising. Mobiles, connections, games, a wee shite like thing for your energy suppliers are all beyond me. I don’t get any of them, so why should I spend fifteen minutes an hour watching all this irritating garbage.

The totally unrealistic expectations get me. Sure I need new windows, a kitchen and a host of other things but showing me them on the TV will never brainwash me into buying before I am ready to.

Talking about unrealistic adverts. I’m not female, I’m male, nearing fifty, who has had women ‘Always’ in his life. So I know, no lady wants to be trampolining while wearing white clothes, being punched in the stomach with some ugly mother nature character with wings, when it is anti-social week. (Please take that with all due sympathy, respect and Mars Bars!!)

I resent the adverts showing me clips of sodding shows that I wouldn’t dream of watching. Clips of reality TV with mutants who should only be experimented on doesn’t fill me with joy. Soaps, I don’t want to see a dramatic rendition of the unrealistic pish that is a story line.

Holidays, cars, and shopping in M&S are all things that I can’t afford, so thanks for reminding me!

I think anyone who wants to work in advertising should be stoned, shot, burned and then hung. The TV companies and stations have now all co-ordinated this endless stream of drivel. It used to be that you could flick from one station to another to avoid, but not now. They are regimented and co-ordinated.

So what I suggest is at the start of any programme that you want to watch, pause for fifteen minutes and then fast forward during these abominations. Even better, switch off all the power when the adverts come on, give it three minutes and then switch back on. Or better still, don’t buy anything that is advertised. A worldwide black out, that is what is called for!!

Anyhow, that is my rant over. I cut out 3000 profanities from this post so that it isn’t sponsored by swearjar.com.uk

So to this weeks offerings with no endorsements.

For the first time in a while, we have no new writers to showcase. We do however have some very skilled and seasoned writers.

Topics this week include unfortunate circumstances, memory issues, prosthetic problems, a heist and either a con or an opportunity.

On Monday, we had Dave Henson with his wonderful character based story ‘Squirrel‘.

‘I loved the patois and rhythm in this.’

‘The story is tragic but it made me smile.’

‘A poetic ending with a squirrel happily stuck up a tree.’

No difference to the following of Monday. Paul Thompson added to his stories with ‘House Of Mugs‘ on Tuesday.

‘Strange, puzzling and very unsettling.’

‘The story twisted without deceiving.’

‘I had a couple of reads to try and spot any clues, none were obvious and this was well done.

Wednesday came and Mr Fred Foote give us a wee bit of a horror with ‘Rearmed‘.

‘This was different from the normal rogue prosthesis story.

‘I find the women’s’ acceptance intriguing and it adds another layer to this.’

‘The Aboriginal references were fascinating.

I’m always glad to introduce a fellow countryman. Not only has James McEwan given us some wonderful stories, he continually comments with very insightful, deep and technical observations. We all thank you for your in-put James.

So on Thursday we published his story, ‘Forked Tongue.’

‘I enjoyed the scene setting and Marie was a very interesting character.’

‘Very proficient writing.’

‘The readers perceptions changed along with the character.’

Not much to say about the end of the week except that it is always on a Friday.

Another major contributor to the site, Mr Adam Kluger was last up with ‘The Post Office.’

‘They were incorrigible, but I liked that.’

‘Witty and clever.’

‘Irresponsible and self absorbed but I liked that also.’

That’s it folks. Another week gone.

I must apologise for my rant but surely I am not the only one who wants to murder due to the break in between programmes?

I have been off on a rant tangent so I need to try and bring it back to the subject of writing, so here goes:

Not only don’t watch adverts, don’t write them either!!!!!!!

Hugh

Banner Image: Courtesy of Pixabay.com

8 thoughts on “Week 89 – Adverts, Cramps And Protests.

    • Cheers Diane,
      I need to thank you once again for the images, which make me smile.
      You understand my irritations so well!
      Your continual support and help makes all of this enjoyable.
      Hugh

      Liked by 1 person

  1. A short part of my list of horrors which overlaps yours largely. Reality shows and reality stars are both oxymorons. In writing “issue” for “problem”, “end of the day” (not a time), radar, excessive use of impact (does no one know what affect and effect mean?). Anything about my ethnicity is better than yours’. Then and than confused as well as your and you’re. Any text is bad.

    I think that Literally Stories and I are OK on those matters (I almost wrote issues – I don’t use issues except to complain about its use).

    Like

    • Good on you for venting those irritations. I think more folks should do this honestly. But I suppose that could lead to more divorces and Lawyers would win. That would then become a major irritation for many of us!
      Thanks as always for your support and your continual input to the site.
      All the very best my friend.
      Hugh

      Like

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