Latest News, Short Fiction

Week 319 – Too Much Variety, Diane’s Enthusiastic Observations And A Development That Would Make Satchmo Cry.

Hi folks here we are at Week 319.

This was one of those weeks I had no idea what I was going to write, but a quick look at the paper with a can of lager and I saw my inspiration. (For all you anal types out there, it was me who was drinking the lager and not the paper – And yes, I know, I should have sorted the sentence which would have stopped me typing this pish!)

Continue reading “Week 319 – Too Much Variety, Diane’s Enthusiastic Observations And A Development That Would Make Satchmo Cry.”
Latest News, Short Fiction

Week 318 – A Sensitive No-Go Area, An Itch That Couldn’t Be Scratched And Jesus Body-Popping To ‘My Diane’ (He Nailed It)

I was going to do something about procrastinating this week but I couldn’t be fucked.

I think I’ll ask Diane to put the read more tag after the next sentence so I can warn ‘The Sensitives’, I was going to call them Fuckwits and in a way, I suppose I have.

WARNING – Blasphemous Material – Do not read on if you are of a religious persuasion and likely to be offended. If you read on and are offended – Well – I told you!!!

Continue reading “Week 318 – A Sensitive No-Go Area, An Itch That Couldn’t Be Scratched And Jesus Body-Popping To ‘My Diane’ (He Nailed It)”
All Stories, Romance, Short Fiction

Week 317 – ‘Manners Maketh The Man’ Is Just A Saying And Not A Singularity, Opening A Door Is Just Manners And Emily Dinova’s Saturday Special.

Well here we are at Week 317.

This week is like the old saying about buses. (For all the kids reading this – A bus is not your mum or dad giving you a lift somewhere, it is a big long vehicle that takes loads of you as long as you pay. Paying is when you give your own money to someone in exchange for items or services that you need / want)

I like to teach the youth of today – From a distance that is. I’d hate to do something radical like talk to the wee mutants. To be fair, I don’t think they can hold a conversation without typing it badly. I like to teach the youth of today – From a distance that is. I’d hate to do something radical like talk to the wee mutants. To be fair, I don’t think they can hold a conversation without typing it badly.

Continue reading “Week 317 – ‘Manners Maketh The Man’ Is Just A Saying And Not A Singularity, Opening A Door Is Just Manners And Emily Dinova’s Saturday Special.”
Latest News, Short Fiction

Week 316 – Subservient Pricks, An Unpleasant Repair And Why Steve Was Screaming.

This week some British people have been trying to decide what is fact and what is fiction. That’s a cracker as those who wonder are more than likely to bow and will believe what they’re told, depending on who tells them. Me, I don’t give a cat’s coke.

Continue reading “Week 316 – Subservient Pricks, An Unpleasant Repair And Why Steve Was Screaming.”
Latest News, Short Fiction

Week 314 – Determination, Crushed Testes And An Acceptable Arc Of Urine.

This week I’d like to discuss not giving up. It’s quite apt as we had a writer not so very long ago advise us that they were giving up since this was now their fourth refusal. That is for them to decide but in the whole scheme of things four refusals isn’t that much. But it’s up to the person and how they feel.

Continue reading “Week 314 – Determination, Crushed Testes And An Acceptable Arc Of Urine.”
Latest News, Short Fiction, Writing

Week 313 – Speed, Alex O’Hara Was A Knob-End And Trust Me, ‘Old Shep’ Is Worse!

I don’t know why I was wondering how many words a minute I could type. I decided to test myself. I can do around three hundred which I’m led to believe is quite impressive. I was so proud until I found out they all couldn’t be the same word without any spaces. No one appreciates my three hundred ‘a’s.

Continue reading “Week 313 – Speed, Alex O’Hara Was A Knob-End And Trust Me, ‘Old Shep’ Is Worse!”
Latest News, Short Fiction, Writing

Week 312 – True Romance Is Quentin’s Best Work, Alternative Head Cleaning And A Nod To Lives Gone By.

We had Valentine’s Day this week.

If it made you feel all fluffy and unnecessary and gave you inspiration to write a romantic romance to warm the heart, you are welcome to send it hopefully to anywhere else bar us.

(Unless of course it has a sneaky and clever twist that will make us go OOOH – dd)

Continue reading “Week 312 – True Romance Is Quentin’s Best Work, Alternative Head Cleaning And A Nod To Lives Gone By.”
Short Fiction, Writing

Week 311 – Everything, Long Legged Linda And That Dirty, Dirty Water.

Well here we are at Week 311.

I was saddened this week to read of the death of Christopher Plummer.

Not as sad as I was when I became aware of ‘The Sound Of Music’.

To be fair, I haven’t seen it all the way through, just a look at those weird weans gives me the fear.

Continue reading “Week 311 – Everything, Long Legged Linda And That Dirty, Dirty Water.”
Latest News, Short Fiction, Writing

Week 310 – Fat Larry’s Prediction, Always Yours And Paloma’s Saturday Special.

Not too much nonsense from me as we have that once in a six year thingy that we do – We have a Saturday Special!!

But I’d like to state, this week I’ve lost my ZoomTimeFace Virginity.

I don’t like it. I prefer to talk pish to folks without seeing my huge face looking back at me.

Continue reading “Week 310 – Fat Larry’s Prediction, Always Yours And Paloma’s Saturday Special.”
Latest News, Short Fiction, Writing

Week 309 – Beef Pavlova, The Twelve O’Clock Rule And Kids – Do You Really Know What Snail Mail Is?

Do you ever wonder why you do things?

Me, I contemplate why I throw salt over my shoulder, why I touch my collar and knee every time I see an ambulance, why I touch black when I see a hearse, why I need to close doors, why I need to remove a plate that I’ve finished with, why I work harder than my body allows, why I write these and more importantly why I don’t really kill some folks.

But hey-ho – Most of us are probably in the same boat. Well those of us who have embraced our madness and don’t simply want to talk about it.

Continue reading “Week 309 – Beef Pavlova, The Twelve O’Clock Rule And Kids – Do You Really Know What Snail Mail Is?”