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Week 320 – Don’t Let Your Teenage Kids Out Your Sight, Ugly Vampires And Editor Eating Cats.

I’ve been known to fuck about with a whole range of subjects in these postings but for this part, I need to put on my sensible head.

It has been a very sombre time in Britain. And I will also bow my head in respect. These are dark times, which, if we stick together, we will get through.

It is now official, there are no virgins left in the whole of The British Isles. Their blood has all been used up trying to revive the auld duke without any success.

But to all you royalists out there, don’t worry, the powers that be are going to give it a few weeks and once some more thirteenth birthdays have kicked in, they will try again. Let’s keep our fingers crossed that he will be up and about yet again. You can’t to keep a good racist down!

But we won’t see him as he will be in that secret underground lair. It’s a mile or so under the ground directly below Milton Keynes. He will be a new edition to the sixty one others who are pure breds, he is still a hanger-on – I’m not sure how they work out which family members are allowed in but I’m sure his Mother-in-Law will show him the ropes.

I just love how some folks receive titles that they have no connection to – I mean Duke of Edinburgh. I wonder what part of Brigadoon he came from to merit that title? He’s as Scottish as the queen of England’s tits!

I was doing a wee bit of research about this day in history and two things sprung out. First off, the song ‘Rock Around The Clock’ was released on this day in 1954. Now that isn’t very interesting but it gives me an excuse to mention the best version of a terrible song that lifted it from a terrible song to one that was quite brilliant.

‘See You Later Alligator’ – Bill Haley – Terrible!

‘See You Later Alligator’ – Dr Feelgood – Fecking amazing!!! One of the best Feelgood tunes ever!! (See what I did there!)

A lot of folks don’t know about Doctor Feelgood but they were the trailblazers of pub rock which opened the door for many a group. (Elvis Costello, Ian Duri, Dave Edmunds, The Stranglers and Eddie And The Hotrods to name but a few)

The other piece of history that I would never have guessed in a million years was when Anne Rice had her first book ‘Interview With The Vampire’ published – It was 1976, I thought it was a lot later.

I wonder if it was Miss Rice who opened the door for all these young beautiful vampires that the kids now-a-days have claimed their own? Give me the two penises with teeth that were Max Schreck and Reggie Nalder, who were Nosferatu and Stephen King’s ‘The Master’ from Salem’s Lot. (Oh and a mention for Luke Goss in Blade II – Although he would never be as scary as he was with his involvement in the horror that was ‘Cat Amongst The Pigeons’. I know that I have mentioned this before but it is so dire people need to be continually warned!)

If I was starting out reading novels I’d probably have went through more of Anne Rice’s books. I’ve enjoyed the three that I’ve read. ‘The Vampire Lestat’ (Cracking character although a bit too pretty – Well that was until I saw Mr Cruise looking as foppish as an alive duke.) ‘The Queen Of The Damned’ – I honestly can’t remember too much except that I did enjoy it. And the best God / Devil argument ever – ‘Memnoch The Devil’

Whilst doing this research I saw a picture of Anne Rice – She looks like a very interesting lady!

Okay onto this week’s stories.

We had three new writers and two old friends of the site.

Topics this week include; a past life, mercy, a casualty of war, an aftermath and quietness.

As always our initial comments follow.

First up was Marco Etheridge. This story marked him reaching double figures. Less than 3% of our writers have managed that!

‘To Keep The Wound Greengot us up and running.

‘Very well done.’

‘You just want to read on.’

‘Marco is a very accomplished story teller.’

Another well established writer is Yash Seyedbagheri. He was on the site on Tuesday for the thirteenth time.

Bottled’ was next up.

‘Yash has captured something of the struggle and the excuses and the desperation.’

‘Another example of his skill!’

Our first new writer broke the back of the week.

To all of them, we send them a huge welcome, we hope that they have fun on the site and as always, we want to see more of their work.

‘History In A Trash Can was Mark Fellin’s story for Wednesday.

‘The historical parallels tied in with the title.’

‘There is a note of hope for the future for his mate.’

‘Really good writing.’

Our next new writer was Bryn Ledlie.

Her story ‘Whiplash’ nearly finished off the week.

‘This is such a strong piece of writing that you want to come up with some sort of reasoning.’

‘Unrelenting – This is a difficult thing to write about well.’

And we completed the week with our third newbie.

Anthony Billinghurst’s ‘Just Let Go’ finished us off on Friday.

‘As a piece of writing, this is very good.’

‘It ends with a real sadness.’

‘This begins with horror and moves through even more pain.’

Well that’s us rounded up the round up.

Just the usual pleas – Comments – Good!

No comments make us sad!

And have a go at the Re-Run. Just pick an older story that you’ve enjoyed, write a spiel or introduction and throw in a few questions for the writer. We’ll post exactly what you send us.

So many have promised – Very few have stepped up!

Not much more to say, maybe except I’ve fucked up my chance for a Knighthood!

I am determined to reach one hundred years of age so I can send my telegram back.

Just to finish off a bit of news.

Family and work commitments have caused Nik to take a back seat for now.

Due to the amount of stories that we have coming in we decided that we needed some help. We have asked Leila to join us an editor. Leila has done so much for the site and is on here nearly every day, so she was the natural choice.

Both myself and Diane are grateful for her help and we send her a huge welcome. We hope that she doesn’t regret saying yes!!!

We’ll give her a few weeks and then see if she wants to do one of these. Well that is if she hasn’t pulled her hair out, killed anyone who hasn’t followed the guidelines, killed either me or Diane or her cats have ate her.


I also want to welcome Leila. I was absolutely chuffed when she agreed to take this on. I’m sure she’ll be a huge asset to the site and hopefully she’ll soon be fully settled in. She’s been brilliant already.


7 thoughts on “Week 320 – Don’t Let Your Teenage Kids Out Your Sight, Ugly Vampires And Editor Eating Cats.”

  1. My thanks to Diane, Hugh and Nik for their help and support. I hope that I can get firmly locked in before anyone has discovered that he or and/or she has made a hideous mistake letting me in.
    There used to be a very old joke that was already on unsteady legs when my grandfather was young (in the US, anyway), in which kids (or people who never grew up) would call stores that sold tobacco and ask “Do you have Prince Albert in the can?” When the answer was “yes” the prankster would say “Then let him out, he’s suffocating.”
    That’s the only thought that popped into my head when I heard of the Prince’s demise (to be honest, I thought that had already happened a couple years ago). Anyway it’s hard to shed a tear for someone who lived fabulously, almost hit a hundred and just looked like someone who’d provide pensions for the polo ponies but not the livery staff. Which is a nice way of saying the guy looked like a prick, as does his son. (I like the Queen. I think she would have made her own mark without being born into it.)



    1. Hi Leila,
      Thanks as always and there are no regrets!!
      Just one wee quick comment – I don’t know why there is any feeling of positivity for the woman who lives in the big house – She was the one that knighted Saville!!!


      1. As you see I have not taken exception to playing third fiddle behind a dead royal and Nosferatu (there’s a brilliant movie in which Willem DaFoe played his straight. So brilliant I can’t recall the name). But the cats want to know if you mean an editor who eats cats or the other way around? Goes without saying which side of the question they fall.


    2. We are really glad you’re here – It’s lovely to have a new face around the water cooler!!!.

      I like the queen and she looked so little and forlorn today – I know she’s probably not (well she is little but maybe not quite as forlorn as we all assume). I agree with what you say Hugh about that Savil person but I’m not sure she has all that much say in it these days. After all those years it’s got to be hard without the hubby to make the morning cuppa. I don’t have a lot of time for the rest of them but Zara Phillips showed some class marrying Mike Tindall – Aye Hugh – ‘send him homeward ta think again!!!’ 🙂


      1. Hi Diane,
        We will never know who knew what but I think she did!
        Where do you think he got the gold and the bad taste for his ‘Jooowlerry, joowlerry’!! (Man – That’s hard to write phonetically!)
        And yes, regarding that young female one – It was refreshing seeing a royal not marrying a relation or an attention seeker!!


    1. Hi Dave,
      Always a pleasure to see you around.
      And thanks for the kind words regarding Leila!!
      All the very best my fine friend.


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