All Stories, Fantasy

From His Perspective by Lisa Keeble

“Have we got any biscuits? I’m feeling a bit peckish”

“You’re not peckish, you’ve only just had lunch. You’re just bored; you know you don’t like it when it’s too quiet in the factory”

“Look if I want a sodding biscuit………oh hang on a minute what’s going on over there…”

“What? Where?”

“Over there look, someone’s making a declaration of some sort; this should be interesting….wait…oh no, that’s torn it!”

“hmmm? munch, munch, what?”

“Where did you get that biscuit?! Didn’t you hear what he just said? It’s a disaster”

“Sorry, no, it’s the biscuit, it’s really crunchy……”

“He just said “All Men are Created Equal”

“He didn’t?!!???”

“He bloody did! Will you stop spraying crumbs all over my desk”

“He can’t say that boss, there’ll be chaos!”

“Well duh, you think?”

“There’s no need to be sarcastic………what are we going to do about it?”

“Not a lot we can do is there, the words are out there now. Go and put the kettle on and I’ll see how much essence of sheep we’ve got left”

“I told you that free will would give us a problem…..more sheep essence I said….can’t go wrong with sheep I said……”

“Stop muttering, I’m trying to think”

“I was just saying………you’re just in a bad mood because I ate the last biscuit”

“The last….??? Look forget about biscuits for a minute, I’ve had an idea. Why don’t we give them a template”

“What do you mean, a template?”

“You know, we’ll take all the best bits of the ones that are down there now and make a template, so they’ll know what they all need to be equal to, otherwise they’ll just be squabbling about this for ever more. You know what they’re like ‘your mountain’s got more trees on it, it’s not fair’, ‘our deity’s bigger than yours’, ‘he’s got more cows than me’, honestly, it never stops! Nope, we’ll give them a template and they’ll all want to be like that, and everyone will be equal. It’s brilliant!”

“When you say the best bits what do you mean? Really good hair and a nice bum? I did a great bum the other day, round and peachy, perfectly symmetrical….I was proud of that bum…”

“What are you rambling about? No, I’m talking about kindness, understanding, compassion, intelligence, honesty, determination….the good bits”

“The bits you do, you mean?”

“Well, I suppose so yes…”


“Oh, don’t get all huffy, you can do the bum alright?”

“Yay! Let’s get cracking!”

“Yes, ha ha, ‘cracking’ very funny”


“Never mind, just get on with it”

Time passes………..


“How can it take so long to do one bum? No don’t answer that, just stick it on….no, other way up…..right good it’s ready to go”

More time passes….

“How’s the template going boss? Did they get it? Are they all feeling nice and equal now?”

“I don’t want to talk about it”

“Why? What happened?”

“………..they shot him”

“Bugger! Oh well better luck next time, fancy a biscuit?”

“I’m not hungry


Lisa Keeble

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14 thoughts on “From His Perspective by Lisa Keeble”

  1. Hi Lisa,
    It’s great to see a story from you on the site.
    This is perceptive but delivered in such a way that it engages the reader and even though the points are obvious and relevant, it still makes you smile.
    Looking forward to seeing more!

    Liked by 1 person

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