I don’t know why I was wondering how many words a minute I could type. I decided to test myself. I can do around three hundred which I’m led to believe is quite impressive. I was so proud until I found out they all couldn’t be the same word without any spaces. No one appreciates my three hundred ‘a’s.
Continue reading “Week 313 – Speed, Alex O’Hara Was A Knob-End And Trust Me, ‘Old Shep’ Is Worse!”
We had Valentine’s Day this week.
If it made you feel all fluffy and unnecessary and gave you inspiration to write a romantic romance to warm the heart, you are welcome to send it hopefully to anywhere else bar us.
(Unless of course it has a sneaky and clever twist that will make us go OOOH – dd)
Continue reading “Week 312 – True Romance Is Quentin’s Best Work, Alternative Head Cleaning And A Nod To Lives Gone By.”
Well here we are at Week 311.
I was saddened this week to read of the death of Christopher Plummer.
Not as sad as I was when I became aware of ‘The Sound Of Music’.
To be fair, I haven’t seen it all the way through, just a look at those weird weans gives me the fear.
Continue reading “Week 311 – Everything, Long Legged Linda And That Dirty, Dirty Water.”
Not too much nonsense from me as we have that once in a six year thingy that we do – We have a Saturday Special!!
But I’d like to state, this week I’ve lost my ZoomTimeFace Virginity.
I don’t like it. I prefer to talk pish to folks without seeing my huge face looking back at me.
Continue reading “Week 310 – Fat Larry’s Prediction, Always Yours And Paloma’s Saturday Special.”
Do you ever wonder why you do things?
Me, I contemplate why I throw salt over my shoulder, why I touch my collar and knee every time I see an ambulance, why I touch black when I see a hearse, why I need to close doors, why I need to remove a plate that I’ve finished with, why I work harder than my body allows, why I write these and more importantly why I don’t really kill some folks.
But hey-ho – Most of us are probably in the same boat. Well those of us who have embraced our madness and don’t simply want to talk about it.
Continue reading “Week 309 – Beef Pavlova, The Twelve O’Clock Rule And Kids – Do You Really Know What Snail Mail Is?”
Well it’s now Week 308!
I have no inspiration this week so I’ve decided to do something a wee bit different.
I was hoping that I could write some plaudits regarding John Higgins after some of the best snooker I’ve ever seen with his match against Ronnie O’Sullivan in the quarter final of ‘The Masters’ but he was beaten in the final by a twenty year old. (Fair play to Yan Bingtao though! That boy has some bottle!)
It is very writing relative as it is a total play on words. Not the snooker! The thing that is a wee bit different!
Continue reading “Week 308 – Does Anyone Remember: Old Blind Jack Getting Carried Away By Dwarves? When A Competition Needed To Be Worked At? And Dr Who In A Skirt Before Dr Who Could Wear A Skirt?”
And following last weeks, Week 306, we now have this weeks, Week 307.
We are proud of our logic and counting ability!
Both myself and Diane love to see new writers submit their work, especially youngsters. They are up against it though as the more life experience you have, the more you can write about a whole range of different topics.
Continue reading “Week 307 – RIP Ron, You Can’t Add To What’s Already Sad And Fill In The Missing Person: Fu Manchu, Dr No, Dr Evil And ???”
And now we are at Week 306.
Before we start I need to tell you that we’re still being inundated by those who insist on telling us that they are one of those ‘ThemTheys’ or ‘TheysThem’ and we are sick of it. I really could go off on a rant but let’s just say that the voice of reason, Diane, censored me and stopped me calling those who insist on telling us that they are a ThemTheys or ‘TheysThem’ a name that is associated with rhyming slang and an actor who did a coffee advert.
Continue reading “Week 306 – Heed The Guidelines, Tarzan And June And I Nearly Forgot About Tin Machine!”
Saturday 2nd January 2021
Here we are at Week 305.
Before I start you will see the date at the top of this page – That’s for me. I’m working from the 1st – Don’t know about the second, have been on the next four from when I’m writing this, which gives me two days off in between.
Continue reading “Week 305 – No Idea, No Coal And No Difference.”
Well, we are now at Week 304.
I hope everyone had as good a Christmas as possible.
I do think that today, not the day that I am writing this, but the day that you are reading it, unless it is any other day than the day that it was posted, is the most depressing day of the year. It feels like those depressing Sunday nights where Monday mornings loomed.
Maybe it’s just me and I don’t know why I feel that way. Maybe something happened to me in a past life.
Continue reading “Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeelll, (I checked Phonetically) Chic Young Is A Legend And Who Wants A Pasty When You Can Fuck A Sophia Loren?”
literally stories 