I know that this may be a bit ironic but I would like to mention some inane witterings and questions. Not so much in stories but in real life. So if you are going to inanely witter, then make it about real life and you will be forgiven due to realism!
The biggest culprits are those good folks who have mobiles. I have lost count on how many times I have been on a bus only to overhear someone telling someone that they are on the bus and on their way to see them. Is it just me or would the person been able to figure that out?
Shops are another cracking source for material. How sad is it hearing someone ask what toilet tissue they have to get as the store doesn’t have the type that is on the list. On the whole, does it ever make any difference?
I haven’t got a mobile. I don’t want one. Gwen once asked me what I would do if I didn’t have a phone and someone had died. I pointed out very gently that me picking up the phone wouldn’t help. (I wonder if O2 will ever do a Lazarus model?) She then asked what would happen if I dropped with a heart attack. I think the searing pain coursing down my left side would affect my ability to use a phone even if I had one. And what the hell, everyone else has one so surely someone might help!
My dad was also guilty. Not with mobile inspired nonsense but with the inane questions. I am going back to those years when you only had a newspaper to guide you to what was on the TV. We would all return home at the same time from my grans or whatever, he would switch the TV on and ask every bloody time, ‘What’s this?’
Repetition can be of some use but it can also be very boring and annoying.
I’ll give another example of repetition. I used to have an old lady who came into the Bakers where I worked at exactly 06.20am every morning. She greeted me with, ‘You’re there.’ immediately followed by ‘It’s yourself.’ After twelve years of this I wanted to stab her through the face.
The other phrase, well, question that makes my blood boil is after you have been to a funeral and are asked, ‘Well, did everything go all-right?’ I am tempted to answer, ‘No. It was a disaster. The corpse came alive and ruined the bloody funeral. It put me right off my wee sausage roll.’ (NB – In Scotland when you die, you are grieved by people eating flaky pastry – I don’t know why but I should know as I have made enough of them in my time at the Bakers, in the morning when the sodding ‘Your there’ wee woman came in!!!
Onto this weeks stories!!
Another mix of some cracking topics. We had unusual instruments, childhood, a fisherman, tweed and films of the 1950s…Eclectic or what??
Now I could put a link in here but I won’t! I will just remind you that our comments are included!
Adam Kluger needs no introduction. He has sent us many stories which need to be read. ‘The Rain Washed Him Clean‘ was first up on Monday.
‘Reads like a fable and I really liked it.’
‘Gentle compared to some of Adam’s work but that doesn’t matter, it is good.’
Most fables have either a revelation, a truth or a consequence, this has all three.
On Tuesday we had the first of two new authors to the site. We hope that their first stories will be the start of a long back catalogue. We welcome Simon Barker with his story ‘Ruby‘.
‘A poignant short with wry humour.’
‘The ‘sightless child’ line was bitter, sad, lonely and realistic.’
‘Well written and a bit different.’
We follow one new writer with another. The same hello and wishes go to Anderson Ryle who was up on Wednesday with ‘Savage Country‘.
‘This was relevant and could be taken a few different ways.’
‘There is a great deal of emotion within this.’
‘It touches on a lot and says a lot.’
On Thursday, another man who needs no introduction. The writing skill of Tom Sheehan is there for all to see in his short story ‘Knickers On The Loose.’
‘Some clever observations on family life and growing up.’
‘The style and pace was wonderful.’
On Friday we were so pleased to publish an old friend of the site. Along with June, James and a few others he regularly comments on the stories. Comments keep the site alive and that is why we ask that you all look back. Don’t be shy, even if you don’t write, you can comment.
We thank Doug Hawley for all his support and we are happy to see him with another story going up.
‘When Planets Miss‘ was our last of the week.
‘The subject matter is well done with more than a few recognisable nods!’
‘The style was true to the story.’
‘Well written. I enjoyed the social commentary which was true to the time.’
That’s another week in folks. We hope that you found something to your taste.
Now please switch off those phones, listen for dialogue that makes you want to tear your ears off and write them down!!!!!
Banner Image: By Leon Brooks [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons