All Stories, Fantasy, Humour

Kingdom Collapse by Doug Hawley

On July 5 of 2033 Antarctic bases McMurdo, Davis, Casey and others reported earthquakes of 6 magnitude on the Richter scale. South Africa and Tierra Del Fuego in South America had minor tsunamis shortly after the earthquakes.  Helicopters flew to the suspected center of the disturbance near the South Pole.  What they saw was deeply disturbing.  An area of hundreds of thousands of square kilometers had subsided anywhere from a few to a hundred meters deep.  What appeared to be naked humans were slowly digging out of the steaming slush.  As the observers goggled at the scene, something like a red guided missile flew out of the depression so fast it was just a blur.  There was no safe landing place, so the helicopters which were short of fuel flew back to their bases.  When the film they had taken was released, the world observed a second odd event.

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Fantasy, Humour, Short Fiction

My Fair Juan G Starring Boots the Impaler By Leila Allison

I was watching the 1969 Science Fiction flick The Valley of Gwangi on TV last month. It was playing on the ancient Philco set that connects the PDQ network in our sister realm of Other Earth to my home realm of Saragun Springs. The film was the final Ray Harrhausen/Willis O’Brien dinosaur picture. The story involved a thirty-foot tall, psychotic Allosaurus named (brace yourself) “Gwangi,” who somehow managed to reproduce (apparently without a Mrs. Gwangi) and survive at a “Forbidden Valley” in Mexico with other unlikely creatures for at least 145-million years–without, mind you, attracting notice until 1969–that from a reptile with the brain power of a caraway seed.

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Fantasy, Humour, Short Fiction

The Giant Clock Radio by Leila Allison

Prologue

A psycho doesn’t need to explain her actions until the trial begins. And even then it is optional. Thus the answer to all things “Why?” in my make-believe land of Saragun Springs is almost always a case of a shrug and the words “shit happens”–a concept that is a byproduct of Free Will. Still, everything sounds fancier in Latin, and telling someone “Stercore Accidit ” gives one an air of scholarship; the following is a case of Stercore Accidit if there ever has been one.

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Fantasy, Humour, Short Fiction

From the Files of the Alone Park Project By Leila Allison

Behold the little god of half-assedness

Officially nameless, Charleston’s “Alone Park” was once part of neighboring New Town Cemetery. “Once” because In 1973 two-hundred square feet of graveyard property was accidentally left out when chainlink replaced New Town’s original fencing. Upon discovering the error, the city council refused to cough up another cent for link-fencing, but it didn’t want an inch of their property left unconquered, either.

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All Stories, Fantasy

To Wilt by Djordje Negovanovic

Death loved Life, and she loved him, too. 

Life was everything and nothing. Her skin, translucent and radiant, was the sun, and her shining eyes the millions of stars. Her small mouth was the clouds and her hair was the singing forests. Life sang, passionate and golden, and green was brought to the world. Life wept, and water nourished the land. Life slumbered, and there were nights of twilight.

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All Stories, Fantasy, Humour, Short Fiction

billigitmania by Leila Allison

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It’s hard to ignore five shadows cast on your desk by as many hovering beings outside the window. I do not know if there is an achievable degree of determination to successfully ignore such a situation; if so, it lies beyond my level of sticktoitiveness.

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All Stories, Fantasy

The Dog in Our Dream by Chris Farrington

It came to us in our dreams.

That’s how it passed, jumping from person to person, dream by dream. Some were lucky and woke with just a mild fever, but others weren’t so fortunate. They were never the same again following that dream, and sadly, some never woke at all.

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All Stories, Fantasy, Science Fiction

Sunday School by Marco Etheridge

The children tumble into the church basement, pushing, dodging, and shouting. Good boys and girls, but wild with pent-up feral energy. Deacon Grumpus pauses at the top of the stairs. He understands the cacophony and approves. Good old-fashioned childish exuberance. So human, organically human, as it should be. Exactly what the Divine Order of Cellular Humans teaches its followers.

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Fantasy, Humour, Short Fiction

Hobnob Standard by Leila Allison

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Famous fantasy realms are ridiculously wealthy– them with their pool parties and scantily clad underage lawsuits in waiting. But for every emerald high rise in Oz there’s a dozen impoverished lands of make believe held together by duct tape and the wages of mental illness. My realm of Saragun Springs is as threadbare and stone soup as it gets, but that might be a-changing. Yes, prosperity and the torpedoing of what little charm we have may be just around the corner. Actually, it is up in the sky–and to paraphrase Dickie Plantagenet, we aim to pluck it down.

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All Stories, Fantasy

Mirror Mirror by Morgan Nyx

Little nugget,

When my gram kicked it, I thought I’d get her old fire gear, maybe some cash, not a cheap-o mirror.

I grasped the trinket by its grimy, beige handle, ran my finger along the pimply red rhinestones. Not gram’s style. Nor mine.

Maybe it made the viewer look particularly snazzy. I gazed in. My hair frizzed like limp fusilli and my meatball-colored eyes leered back. Disappointingly accurate. Three fresh scratches gaped across my clavicle, like a tiny demon had scraped its pitchfork against me.

My fingers fluttered to my neck, but the area felt apple skin smooth. The marks didn’t show in my bathroom mirror or later, in the back of my spoon as I shoveled in dinner.

Weird.

I didn’t think about the scratches again until midnight. I was hauling trash to the dumpster, flickering street lamp barely lighting my way, when a stray cat lunged and gashed my neck open.

Just what I needed in my grief: toxoplasmosis.

I ran to the bathroom, blood dripping into the sink like dying rose petals as I dabbed at the scratches. Three scratches.

I grabbed gram’s mirror. It revealed the scrapes alright, but they weren’t scarlet, as they appeared in my bathroom vanity. The bruises shone pink and faded as dollar store carnations, like I’d had the marks for days, not seconds.

Breathing yoga-deep, I clutched the countertop. This mirror showed the future. Of my face, anyway. I eyed it again, plastic and homely as ever.

Touché, gram. Touché.

After that, the mirror lived on my nightstand. I gave it a looksie every morning because you never know, right nug?

One day, a blizzard ripped across the state, snow piled high on the road like a kid got happy with a frosting tip. I planned on going out, determined not to let a little dusting halt my fun, but then I looked in gram’s mirror.

My right eye was a bloody, scrambled egg. My left ear dangled, a piece of chop meat the butcher hadn’t quite cleaved. I stayed home that night, scrolling through channels until the newsman announced it. A massive whiteout caused a twenty-car pile-up on the highway.

Praise be, ugly, magical looking glass. 

So anyway, if you’re reading this, it means I’m gone. Thanks to this mirror, I went out as a decrepit vulture and not as a young, smooshed-up pear on the interstate.

My gram never explained things, so here’s me correcting that. Keep the mirror close and it’ll get you out of a few scrapes, too.

Love you,

Gramma

P.S. Remind your mom to keep my casket closed. No one wants to see a shriveled up bean.

Morgan Nyx

Image: Google Images – Hand held mirror with ornate frame and handle