I’m going to try something different here this week.
Normally I go off in tangents. I’m all over the place and one topic leads to another. But not today.
I’m going to investigate the status quo. And that’ll give me a reason to let you hear some music that a lot of folks hate but I hope that you listen with an open mind, or open ears or whatever the fuck.
Now that I think on it, if I stuck to the status quo I’d go off on tangents, be all over the place and let one topic to lead to another!!
Anyhow due to the repetition of that phrase, it has reminded me that I played this song on repeat many a time. Sorry but the links will get worse!!!
Our normal day consist of Romance, (No not a box of chocolates!) shit submissions, as in discourtesy and disregard and Science Fiction. What is it about that genre?? For something that is supposed to be forward thinking and inventive, a helluva lot of folks come up with the same old ideas.
The one thing that I love as part of our norm, is there’s not one day passes that I don’t smile due to a quip or comment from Diane or Leila.
Man this is a shite link!! But this song also makes me smile!!!! Play it loud!!
What really creases me up is when they get angry! I can be a total tit and will fang about anything and everything but the two ladies are lovely, supportive and caring. So when something infuriates them, it makes me laugh…And a wee bit scared if I’m honest!!
Being part of each others daily life is a lot of fun and it softens the blows of any negatives!
I’ve been thinking on what I’d like as my normality. This sounds like a contradiction but it would be a mix of times. Literally Stories would be throughout!!
Physically, by fuck would I go back to 1986! I played golf, snooker, squash and exercised (Now-a-days, blinking is a chore!) I think my liver would appreciate me back in ‘86 as I was only four years in with my love of alcohol!!
Mentally, that wouldn’t matter as I’ve been fucked since 1970!!
This link is a bit better but still shite! Here’s a song from 1970.
Technology wise, again, I’d choose 1986. I could understand it then!
Music would be anytime from 1986 backwards. There is more shite music from ‘86 forwards!
I know I’ve mentioned this a few times before but it’s worth repeating due to our generation being blamed for the fucked planet – That irks me somewhat!
We should go back to the days of paper pokes* Fuck you Greta – It wasn’t us punters (Hi Leila) who had an insistence on plastic wrappers it was the supermarkets. We were of the time that you took a basket for your groceries, a plate out to the butchers van, got two pence back for our ginges, (Pronounced Gin gees which are bottles of carbonated drinks) saved crisp packets for wee weans (Pronounced Wayne’s as in children – Yep, I’ve also said that a few times before) only put the heating on two hours after we had frozen to death and swapped empty milk bottles for those of the full type…Swap is the wrong word, we still had to pay!!
*Pokes – paper bags. (Helen Lederer once said that Scotland was the only place in the world where you could ask a stranger in a shop for a poke and not get a punch in the mouth)
I’d like as the norm flared jeans and cheese cloth. Suits would have wide trousers, not those fucking choke your legs numbers that we have now. The last time I tried a pair of trousers on, you could count my varicose veins.
I wouldn’t standardise food as I’ve always been curious. And talking about curious, people should admit that there are only three sexualities – Gay. Straight and Greedy – Sorry – Bi!!
I’d like the days to be back where funeral services couldn’t be advertised and that would also be the days when there were very little reality shows.
There would be no point in changing politics as they have always been and will always be a bunch of self-centred, over-privileged fuckwits!
Okay, onto this week’s stories. Four new writers and a man who has been busy over the last couple of weeks.
We welcome our debutants and hope that they have fun on the site.
As always our initial comments follow.
First up was Mark Barlex. He was our first new writer of the week and his story was called ‘See You Next Year.’
‘The bulk under the duvet made me smile.’
‘This was different enough to carry it through.’
‘The ongoing war with the bear was amusing.’
Next up was Christopher Ananais. ‘The Convert’ was an impressive story number twenty one for him.
‘Christopher judged the amount of detail to release perfectly.’
‘Christopher could have laid this on thick but he judged it beautifully.’
‘This is a setting that is often open to drama.’
Sam Kandej is a new writer to the site but he isn’t new to us. We met Sam many years back in the site ‘Shortbread’ where he had many a story published.
‘The Storm And The Silence’ was his first story for ‘Literally Stories.’
‘I was smiling as I read this.’
‘Amusing.’
‘I like the Lennon song at the end.’
The newsters kept coming! Claudine Mussuto was next up with, ‘Memoir Of A Fiction’
‘I enjoyed the set-up.’
‘The somewhat ‘up yours’ attitude of the MC is infectious.’
‘This is something that I want to go back to.’
And we finished off with our last new writer, SJ Butler with ‘The Jump.’
‘A bit weird.’
‘Inventive.’
‘There is always a need to fly.’
That’s another week done and dusted.
No-one has sent in a Re-run suggestion. It would be good if you could. Just pick an older story that you have enjoyed. You can write an introduction or what it meant to you and we will publish it. (Throw in a couple of questions for the writer if you want and we’ll see if they are willing to answer.)
Please keep on sending, reading, commenting and saying ‘Thanks’ if you are commented on. (It’s only polite!)
This may get me into trouble with some fuckwits – It’s happened before but the more I see of this, the more I don’t give a fuck!
The announcement of pronoun has raised it’s head once again. We had someone advising that their pronoun was ‘he’ and ‘they / them.
He / They / Them are a fucking idiot. How can you state that your pronoun is he or they / them? As soon as you say he, that bombs out they / them and vice versa.
I don’t understand most of this pish but even I can see that is a contradiction.
I reckon it’s just idiots following an idiotic fad!!
When you announce this to someone you are in direct contact with, it’s a moot point as they (Used correctly!!!) will only refer to you as your pronoun if they are mentioning you to someone else…But that is also unnecessary as long as they use your name!!!!!
Another gem from Tam Cowan.
On the first Monday in May, no dogs can help farmers as it is a ban collie day!!
And to finish, my favourite Quo song!
Image: A steam iron standing on the end with a gout of steam puffing out ready to iron Hugh’s cheesecloth shirts. from Pixabay.com
literally stories 
Hugh
I was able to open the first two clips at the same time–oh God what noise they made! I knew the first song, but the live one was new to me. Their drummer looks like what Lemmy Kilminster would have looked like if he had the stuff on his face removed.
Oh yes indeed, there would be little pleasure in life if there were not people to bash about for their astonishing ignorance. Whenever I hear someone claim to be a “people person” I avoid the fucker at all costs. Now I think about it the only people I’ve ever heard make that claim are middle managers and politicians. I know of no writer who has ever said it. I do know a retired mortician who told me that disliking human beings made his job easier. Made sense.
Gotta watch the other two clips.
Thanks again for another great Saturday post.
Leila
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