All Stories, Science Fiction

Has Your Universe Been Hacked by Matt Zandstra

Has something gone horribly wrong? Are you beset by the inexplicable certainty that unknown agents have broken history and plunged you into a new and malign reality? Does every day lead you ever further from the path you expected to follow? If you answered yes to any of these questions, there’s a good chance that your universe has been hacked.

First of all, remain calm. The aftermath of a hack event is disorienting. There are, however, various practical steps available to you. This document will walk you through your options.

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All Stories, Fantasy

Bikbratu by Daniel Roy Connelly

Bikbratu’s body was sturdy, his shoulders strong, he dressed well for a man of his age, his face and hair were missing. As we were kerbside catching up with chat, several other people of all types walked past with no faces. Some were hand-in-hand with a partner with a face, nobody had half a face, it was all or nothing it seemed, it looked like only over-eighteens, this was off the scale of impossibility, why hadn’t I heard of this?

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All Stories, General Fiction

Uncle by Ralph Hipps

My uncle was a substantial man, a man whom you could roll because his stomach curved like a ball. I often had the impulse to bowl him: there was something frustrating in the way he spent hours stitching old clothes. His painstaking labour jarred with my need for going fast at the time, which I remember taking the form of speed-reading. While I took a break, I’d find him in the kitchen, stitching lugubriously. I wanted to pick him up and roll him at speed. He was like a blocker, resisting my need to encompass his deliberateness. He was stitching, stitching, methodically bringing together; I, at that age, wanted to tear things apart.

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All Stories, General Fiction, Short Fiction

(100) Calling Occupant By Leila Allison

Saturday, 8 February 2014

Torqwamni County Convalescent Center

4:53 A.M.

Naturally, the first thing healthy people experience when visiting the Torqwamni County Convalescent Center (T3C) is depression; many often secretly promise to kill themselves if they should wind up “like that,” but they never do. Mainly, T3C contains a sum of breathing bodies greater than the number of active minds. Most are elderly, and all are persons too well (in the technical sense) for the hospital but too sick to go home. Hardly any ever go home, save for in the religious view; most depart in the coroner’s van.

The inadequately appreciated orderlies and CNA’s and housekeepers, the real workers who do the staggering dirty work, and who are first blamed when something goes wrong, do their best to take care of the people in double occupancy rooms shared by pairs of the same kind of people: plainly, men with men, women with women, an active mind with another. The insensate are also kept together, or utterly alone, if their population is at an odd number.

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All Stories, General Fiction, Short Fiction

99 Maab and the Rehab Spirit: A Feeble Fable of the Fantasmagorical By Leila Allison

Introduction

Maab is my first FC to name herself. She was simply the Photobomb Fairie until she began to talk. When she called herself “Mab” the first time, someone pointed out that her name has been used by Shakespeare and others, and hardly original. It turns out that Mab is as common a name among Fairies as Taylor is in cheerleading.

No one remembers how the second A landed in the middle of her name, I’m guessing a typo. But Maab liked it and told everyone to call her Maab, and that she would hear it if you omitted either A.

Physically, Maab is four inches long, mostly iridescent green and is a very attractive mix of a Dragonfly and a Tinkerbell sort of person. Like everyone else, Maab moves at various speeds, but unlike the rest of us she is able to hop dimensions and seemingly disappear from common sight and yet still be “there” when captured by a camera–hence the title Photobomb Fairie.

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All Stories, Fantasy, Short Fiction

98 Boots the Impaler and the Qddyte: A Feeble Fable of the Fantasmagorical By Leila Allison

Introduction

From slots 98 on there was going to be a saga. A continuing opus of staggering brilliance; something to cement my legacy. And for one shining moment, all was clear to me. Goodbye Feeble Fable Factory, the kid is on her way! Then the bourbon wore off and I saw the mess I made. And as it always goes in the drizzly gray aftermath, when life shows itself to be little more than a protracted exercise in humiliation and despair, I reluctantly set aside the legend maker and returned to my cell at the Feeble Fable Factory. Which required gaining further permission from the union; permission gained through bribery.

But there was a complication.

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All Stories, General Fiction, Latest News

Week 356: Merry Christmas and some exciting news. 100 for Leila.

Well, it’s Christmas. Well, not really. Actually, as I write this,  it is the twentieth. But since Christmas can be prevented only by the end of the world, the odds favor it coming round with this little missive floating down like a snowflake (or a grain of volcanic ash, depending on how you look at things).

I hope you gave people the things you wanted to give them. That of course is a terribly open wide, bend over kind of statement, but how others stuff stockings is none of my business. 

Lots of people self medicate their way through the season. If alcohol was invented on a specific day, then I see none more appropriate than 25 December 0000. I imagine that back when the Lord walked, a constant intake of mead made living in an era where forty was extremely old, the Romans and their three-hundred gods were bossy thugs, and sanitary facilities were likely stone and thatch rat sanctuaries (which no doubt gave a different meaning to “Jingle Hop” and “Jingle Rock”) tolerable. I do not necessarily advocate drinking as the sole means of surviving  the company of noismome persons you’d not seek to be around on any other winter day, for there are other drugs which can put a smile on your face and dull the edge of your tongue for as long as such abilities need to be available. 

Anyway, whether you celebrate all twelve days or only go as far as watching the first ten minutes of Scrooged, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you. 

This is the site’s last week of free range publishing in 2021. Until we resume regular posting the first week of 2022, the reader will be treated to a landslide of dubious material created by this dubious person as well as a classy western themed day by our own Tom Sheehan. Sanity will be restored on Monday, 3 January 2022. That happens to be my birthday. It is one of the worst locations possible for a child’s birthday because nine times in ten it is the dark and gloomy morning that students go back to school after Christmas break. Even children are weary of “special” events by 3 January. One kid tried to trump my 3 January with his 5 July. I pointed out that his birthday didn’t mean squat anywhere else in the world and that it was held in July, during summer vacation. I believe that darker observations on matters of character were also shared, but I really don’t remember.

But five things I will happily remember are the stories featured during this last normal week of 2021. We have one debut author plus four masters who have over 250 appearances between them–one has set a stunning year record that will be difficult to top.

Marco Etheridge opened Monday with Quiet Longed For, and You. This is Marco’s fifteenth and there are more to come. This piece is one where the title says what it is about, but with every unfolding emotion and displaced thought, it grows into another example of the personal style that Marco excels at.

We ran out of year before Yashar Seyedbagheri ran out of quality stories. On Tuesday Yash clocked in with Step. That made 41 this year. Although there have been some big numbers in the past, none rate higher than the one Yash put up. He writes with great economic flow and I doubt that there are many more than fifty combined words in his list of titles. It’s difficult to imagine Yash getting by people who visit the site, but if that is the case with you, please check him out.

Another inescapable LS writer is Tom Sheehan. On Wednesday his latest, Too Lonely For Dying showed that after all his successes he still has something new to show the reader. Tom’s 150th will open next year, and I can think of no finer birthday present to open.

James Hanna’s Biff Malibu strutted onsite, Thursday. It contains the wry humor so often displayed by James in his eighteen site stories. And it is also a fine tribute to a marriage in which there is still humor and playfulness after so many years.

Lone newcomer Mark Scofield closed the week and year with Horseshoes and Hand Grenades on Friday, Christmas Eve. It is fitting that his entertaining tale of “closeness” should mark the end of one year and open a link to the next. We are all about our old friends, but we also head into the future looking forward to meeting new ones, such as Mark.

Although some of what I’ve just written will appear again in one form or another below, I sincerely wish Diane, Hugh, Nik, Mike, James, Tom, Yash, Marco and all our authors, submitters, readers and Imaginary Friends who live in bottle a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.  

Leila

We are thrilled and excited to bring the news that our long term friend and now editor Leila Allison has reached the dizzying record of 100 stories on the site.

This is incredible and in honour of this amazing feat we are giving Leila a week of her own to publish whatever she chooses with no need to have the works pass through the acceptance stage. They have been automatically accepted and we are absolutely convinced that whatever we have to read in the next week will be the same amazing, thought provoking, amusing, touching stuff as she has presented us with over the last 100 submissions.

Continue reading “Week 356: Merry Christmas and some exciting news. 100 for Leila.”
All Stories, Fantasy

Horseshoes and Hand Grenades by Mike Scofield

Dennis followed the program’s commands and was transported from his den to the stoop outside his father’s last home, a condo in West Palm. The graphics and the audio were intense.

He was there.

His breath caught as his father opened the door, grinning.

“Hey, Den.”

“Dad!”

When they hugged Dennis could all but feel him.

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All Stories, General Fiction

Biff Malibu by James Hanna

My wife, Mary, and I sit on the deck of The Boatyard, a Sarasota seafood restaurant. Since our retirement, we lunch here several times a month. Mary is eating a hamburger because she is allergic to seafood. I am devouring fish-and-chips, which I have smothered with malt vinegar.

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All Stories, General Fiction

Too Lonely for Dying by Tom Sheehan

There was a special sight out in front of him as he rested near a small cave, the weight of his own body suddenly too much for him to carry on weak legs. The decision to stop and enjoy the sight came quickly, in touch with a rare sense of goodness finding its way in him. It was akin to the old days when Sally and he sat on the small porch he’d built for her mornings, the sun giving a grand start to her day. “Oh, Sal,” he’d said a thousand times since then. A thousand times. Once, he had shrugged his head when he said it, as though belief was elsewhere, as Sally was but how long he couldn’t remember.

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