When you put out a shingle that says STORIES WANTED, you get a little bit of the good stuff and plenty of what you deserve for your impertinence. The “plenty of what you deserve” element is easy to describe: In some way something about each one in it sucks. That’s as scientific a way of putting it as I can give you. But the good stuff is hard to define; and sadly, some of the good stuff meets the same fate as the suck stuff for one reason or another. Actually, most of what we reject is well done, just the story is in some way incomplete, in our humble estimation.
Now that I have finished a paragraph that was mostly a second half covering the ass exposed in the first half, I now present a good thing that contains a touch of what is deserved in it. Nose by long time LS friend Doug Hawley tweaks, well, the reader’s nose. It is irreverent and says a lot about the mores of modern “pop culture,” which of course is an extreme oxymoron. Here we have something so wildly over the top that the only way for it to get across successfully involves telling it in all earnestness, which Mr. Hawley has done.
Q: All right, hardly an original question, but what’s the inspiration behind Nose?
Q: You were able to push all the right buttons, funnywise–were there observations that didn’t make it into the story, or was it a fairly simple thing to draft?
***
Q: All right, hardly an original question, but what’s the inspiration behind Nose?
Q1 – I may have mentioned that the “before” version of the singer was Doug AKA Duke. That led to “what if a miserable singer became a great one overnight”. After wondering for a bit about the miracle change and probably discarding some ideas, I came up with an alien agent. I couldn’t think of how the nose invader got there, so I left it a mystery.
Q: You were able to push all the right buttons, funnywise–were there observations that didn’t make it into the story, or was it a fairly simple thing to draft?
Q2 – I never kill my darlings, so I left the kitchen sink in the story. How could I deprive the public of any known gems? If I were writing it today, I might throw in more insults to talk and reality shows. Subtext , if I may use a word that I don’t understand, is that we the people are listening to the wrong people. Oprah et al have a lot to answer for, including but not limited to “Doctors” Phil and Oz. Reality shows are Roman circuses version 5.15. I’m happy that I included praise for Aretha, although her entertaining genius did not extend to other parts of her life.
literally stories 
Thank you, Doug. You are always entertaining and honest. The world needs more of that. But I guess that has always been true.
Leila
(And you’re right–A. was a great singer, but sometimes a little slow paying her bills)
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Still fun and imaginative on second reading. Mick rules.
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Reading this again, it only became better. Wherever Mick came from doesn’t really matter, I think it is the aspiration of being famous that prevails.
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Excellent as always Leila!!
Doug, You have such an interesting persona. I agree with Leila, you are honest as the day is long but beyond that honesty there is a sharp perception and beyond that sharp perception there is a cutting wit and beyond the honesty, sharp perception and cutting wit I reckon your tongue is also in your cheek.
This all makes you a very interesting fellow that I have the privilege to ‘know’ within this weird medium of preconception, guesswork and hope!!!!
Shang-A-Lang my fine friend!
(Nope – Rockin’ in the free world is still a lot cooler!!!!
Hugh
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