Well, hello there folks!
Hope you are all well and I am delighted to welcome you to Week 536!
I know that I have prattled on about snow-flakes and the enraged and the PeeSeee Brigade and I decided to look at it with some positivity.
…I couldn’t think of any but I did consider this.
When I started working around forty two years back, I had a respect for my gaffers. They were no nonsense folks WHO KNEW WHAT THE FUCK THEY WERE DOING!!
You see, in them there olden times you only got promoted from the bottom up. You did the most menial job and if the powers that be thought you did a good job, they moved you up a grade onto something more challenging. This would continue to happen until you either reached your level or you were in wait of the General Manager dying.
Then some fucking idiot thought that it would be a cracking idea to let folks with qualifications skip a few of these levels. (I think the army did the same. I also know what respect anyone with stripes got if they came in with a degree and not experience.)
This started a new culture of the hierarchy not having the knowledge of those who did any individual job. That also then became promotion due to experience and work ethics thrown out the window.
We are now left with so many useless, wrapped up in their own opinion nazis that haven’t got a Scooby on how to treat folks. They dictate, they can’t use experience. They don’t understand differences of opinion or anyone who questions. They go to interviews to bolster their careers with pre-scripted answers to pre-scripted questions. They know that to advance they can’t question or challenge. They just do what they are told and expect everyone else to be the same. When they are in the company of their gaffers they do what they did, they fucking bend over, lube up and accept what they are given.
So when anyone questions them, they fall back on all this PC nonsense by stating, ‘I feel threatened. You are being aggressive. You are invading my space. You are not treating me with respect. *You are being racist. *You are being sexist. *You are being homophobic. And then they play the only card they have…
‘I’m terminating this conversation and you will be on a disciplinary.’
If any of this resonates, do me a favour – Just punch the cunt – You’ll feel a lot better!!!!
* Please note, those phrases, in these instances have nothing to do with any real issues. Just some fucking wank-stain reasoning their ‘fear’ with, at this time, ‘relevant’ buzz-words and anti-social bastardisation.
This is a bit of an off-shoot but the same sort of thoughts came to me when I watched ‘A Confession’ – A true story staring the brilliant Imelda Staunton and Martin Freeman. I’ll not go into too much detail, all I say is the Police closed rank and dictated procedure and policy. Not once did they use any common sense – They tried to spin everything to their advantage. If you watch it I’m sure you will appalled at the stupidity!!
Someone in the pub asked me what I wrote about. I answered ‘A bit of everything.’ But whilst typing this I came to a more detailed answer. I may get this printed on a T-Shirt and sell it to would be writers!
Mick Bloor also inspired me when he stated that it’s easier to recall.
Write what you imagine.
Write what you see.
Write what you think.
Write what you know.
Write what you’ve experienced.
Write your dreams. (Not the ones when you are sleeping – No-one is interested.)
Write your reality.
Write your nightmares. (See two lines above!!)
But no matter what you do – Never write romance!!
Okay, onto this week’s stories.
Four new folks and a returner.
To all our debutants, we give them a warm welcome, we hope that they have fun on the site and most importantly, we want to see more of their work!
As always, our initial comments follow.
On Monday we had our only returner.
Susan Jennifer Polese got us up and running with, ‘Meant For The Dead’.
‘Interesting use of language.’
‘I enjoyed the whimsy.’
‘Well written and thought provoking.’
Our first new writer was next up.
‘The Bone Reader Of Tucson’ was published on Tuesday. Dana Wall was the writer.
‘This has a ‘Hellworld’ feel to it.’
‘Excellent tone.’
‘The descriptions of the powerful bones were excellent.’
We broke the back of the week with new writer number two.
‘The Breather’ by Rebecca Petty was her offering on Wednesday.
‘I really enjoyed the dry humour.’
‘Very entertaining.’
‘I can relate!!’
Dan Bell with ‘Lost In Thought’ was new writer number three.
‘The mind reading threat isn’t as far-fetched as it used to be.’
‘I know that we are hard to please with Science Fiction but I enjoyed this.’
‘This is well done.’
And we completed the week with Rachel Prizant Kotok’s story, ‘Under The Stars.’
‘This one accurately speaks of a shameful moment in history.’
‘Excellent writing.’
‘I couldn’t say no to this one.’
I’m happy to repeat what I’ve been saying over the last few months – Literally Stories is healthy. The comments and interaction continue to be a large part of the site and our visitor figures are excellent.
Keep doing what you are doing folks, it all helps us be what we are!!
I was looking through some historic stupid crimes this week and I found two that made me chuckle. One from America and one from Scotland.
The American one was a guy called Derrick Mosley from Oregon – In his wisdom, he decided to try and rob a gun-shop brandishing a baseball bat. The owner of the shop pulled out his own gun and held him there until the police turned up.
And from Scotland, an unnamed man was arrested for trying to feed a Police-Horse a Sausage Roll. I loved his response when the *Auld Beak asked him why he did it – ‘I thought the horse looked hungry.’
So there’s the difference between America and Scotland – Your criminals use baseball bats and are deterred by guns. Ours use inappropriate bakery goods to try and feed a Horse.
The crimes might be different but I would suggest the stupidity is the same!
*Auld Beak – Judge.
Before some music I found a couple of word puzzles that I liked.
1. How can you spell cow in thirteen letters?
2. What word when you remove four of it’s letter reads the same?
3. What word has three sets of double letters?
Man!! I was tempted to go with ‘Words’ by F.R. David but decided that is shit a link as I’ve ever used! So I decided on something a bit good.
Image: A pile of sausage rolls, enough to feed many horses! from Pixabay.com
literally stories 
Hello Hugh
I believe the corporate world borrowed poorly from the military (at least the American version). The army comissioned officers out of college and dropped them into command of battle hardened troops. No experience at all. I do not have the stats handy but I am willing to wager that most “fraggees” were/are these officers–as such happened to fictional Nedermeyer of Animal House.
I thought I had a winner for Cow, but Queen Camilla comes up a letter shy.
For me, EEEEEEEK! is not damaged by the removal of a few E’s.
Be damned if I know the last one. There was a kid’s show my nieces watched called “Zooboomafoo” but I don’t know if silly names count.boohoohoo
Great work once again.
Leila
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LA
You know so much about everything, including the military! AMAZING…And one massive reason why your fiction is so convincing, all the things behind it that you know which never actually appear literally in the words themselves, etc…..
DB
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Hi Dale
Thank you, I grew up in a military town, and my father was in Korea, my Uncles in WWII, Granfather in WWI (he was borrn in 1882 and was in his thirties–my father was born when he turned fifty something). They all knew about it, but that was a problem
in the draft era. I don’t think it is the same today.
Leila
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Hi Leila,
Thanks as always.
HAH!!! I forgot that Nedermeyer was shot by his own Troops!!!
You always instigate thoughts and memories!
I give you three of the greatest worst songs ever!!
I’d forgot about this!
Hugh
Which reminded me of this!!
And weirdly, that took me to this!!
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Hugh
Been ages since I have seen these. I remember they hired Nedermeyer. Never seen him except A House and TS videos.
I recall another video around that time with Ratt and, of all people, Milton Berle!
Leila
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Hi Hugh
Officers in the military have always been specially trained, but there is a major difference between green and/or ineffective officers and real combat officers. “Band of Brothers” is probably the best drama series on soldiers.
Using this theory in the workplace doesn’t work so well. Civilians aren’t as legally bound to follow orders. And if a person hasn’t done the work but asks others to do it. People don’t like that. Pulling young people from college with the “Sheep skin” and promoting them over others is unfair. They could have almost any kind of degree that may not even pertain to the job itself.
This corporate and factory culture you have described sounds accurate and all around lousy and dismal. Almost Kafkaesque, in its mindless bureaucracy.
Batter up at the gun shop!
Christopher
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Hi Chris,
Two of my Uncles ended up in the SAS. One had worked his way up from a Sqaddie to the rank of Major. I have a huge respect for all the Military…But can’t get my head around who they are fighting for. (Probably apart from WW2) You see, some Bell-End of a politician decides they don’t agree with what another Bell-End of a politician from another country is doing and that is what folks end up signing up for. When there is a chance of invasion, then that’s a totally different matter. I understand the ideal that America is the World Police but this ideal (All of the countries included) didn’t work very well when the biggest travesty ever was beginning to happen! The troops that liberated Auschwitz were overwhelmed with what they saw. I’m not sure if that was a surprise to those in power!!!
Please don’t take that as any political rant, just my perceived observation.
Corporate culture has went from using Disneyland as a model, to mindfulness and now to micro-management…All of these twisted to their own gain and into making them more fucking money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not sure who said it but, ‘Experience is essential but it is something that you can’t teach.’
The only thing with experience is that it breeds cynicism, scepticism and criticism…In other words actuality!!!!!!
Thanks as always my fine friend.
Hugh
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Hugh
I’ve had similar thoughts about the military. It’s for defense not a tool for dominance in the name of democracy. And the corporation’s police force and execution squads.
Agreed WW II was fight or die time…
I don’t know where in our constitution that allows America to be this world police force. It’s sickening! People hate us. Leave people alone! We’ve had some lousy leadership, since Kennedy. Even Kennedy escalated Vietnam. He had 15,000 so-called advisors over there. Even though, in most ways I thought Kennedy was a great president. Great for ordinary people and black people.
My Dad was a Union Committee man for the UAW and he indoctrinated me against management. I think all free thinkers must see that management doesn’t give a fuck about the worker–never have–never will! They like to call people “Bodies.” This offended him a great deal. Dad had all kinds of stories about taking on management at the negotiating table and on shop floor. The Unions first answer to any demand was, NO.
Yes the powers to be back then knew about Auschwitz. They chose to let it happen. Probably for ant-Semitic reasons. And they didn’t want all of those refugees. Legitimate with their lives in the noose refugees. Not like what happens on our borders where they let millions cross illegally. Or at least they did. I’m a Democrat and just about anti-everything the current administration is–except illegal immigration. But they even do that wrong.
Now they’re having these stupid trade wars. President Reagan said, We don’t have trade wars we trade partners. There is no war in trading with other countries. It’s a civil and productive process. Fucking Stupid!
Well said about the facets of experience!
Christopher
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Greetings, Hugh!
LOVE the pix of the wolves, and the song ROCKS!! I showed Boo and Colonel the wolf pix and they HOWLED, and the song is well worth turning up LOUD and playing multiple times!
Your precision, hammered language really nails what the work world has become in every place they speak English on this Planet apparently, because what you say about Scotland could be translated and transferred into America and it’s the same damn thing. I think there’s no doubt that subservience, boot-licking, ass-kissing, servile and cringing obedience, hiding behind pathetic identity-politics, and fear-based kowtowing have all increased at an exponential rate than when yourself and I were a bit younger than we may be now (physically); this kind of weak, sad, and lame behavior has always been a problem among humans (eminently documented and condemned in the Bible) but I do believe you’re very correct, it’s MUCH worse now than it was then and you have nailed the problem to the wall with your wickedly well-chosen words; nice job!
Hilarious about the crime differences in USA and Scotland, think I’d rather be in Scotland instead of getting shot by some darned fool and I’ve SEEN people pull pistols on each other in my very own neighborhood at least twice, and heard them shout about it many more times than twice. (I no longer carry firearms in the trunk of my own vehicle, not that I didn’t used to, because I did used to. Now I’m mean enough to just use my personality; it’s amazing how easy it is to stare down almost every single fool except the most insane ones; and even they can usually be gotten through to.)
Thanks for this excellent post, your rebellious Scottish spirit is both jolting, in the good way, and consoling!
Dale
PS,
It’s worth quoting the Boss here:
“Well, they’re still racing out at the Trestles / But that blood, it never burned in her veins / Now I hear she’s got a house up in Fairview / And a style she’s trying to maintain / WELL IF SHE WANTS TO SEE ME / YOU CAN TELL HER THAT I’M EASILY FOUND / TELL HER THERE’S A SPOT OUT ‘NEATH ABRAM’S BRIDGE / AND TELL HER / There’s a darkness on the edge of town…”
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the requirement to have a university degree to do anything at all was the death knell of the working world as far as I can see. What happened to working your way up from the bottom.
I wonder if Mississippi works or is that disqualified because it’s a proper noun?
Another great post with lots to nod your head at and agree with. thank you – dd
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Hi Diane my thoughts exactly!!
Maybe with the exception of a cleaner (Who Isn’t studying!!!!!!) making their way up to become a Brain Surgeon!!!
I’ll give the answers once I have replied to the comments. I had never thought about Mississippi! But you are right – It’s disqualified for being a Proper Noun (TeeHeeHee! I love a belated Get-Out clause!!!!)
In the name of fuck…Being agree with – I don’t understand – Been with Gwen for too long for that nonsense!!!!!!
Thanks as always for being there!!
Hugh
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Good post with interesting observations. I can’t put into words how much I don’t miss work life. Great to see so many comments on all the stories. Mississippi.
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Hi Dave!!
Diane bombed out your perfectly good answer! Blame her!!!!
I loved work life for the first year. I felt as if I was an adult. After that first year I began to notice all that was wrong with it!!! That escalated for forty or so years and now I am where I am which isn’t a good place!!!!
All my very best to you and yours my fine friend.
Hugh
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Maybe an idea for a regular feature somewhere online: historic stupid crimes ? LOL
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Hi Guylaine,
I think you are onto something!
Scotland alone would be a bountiful source of material!!!!
Thanks so much my fine friend.
Hugh
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Hi Dale,
Just seen that your comments have been posted twice.
Maybe Diane or Leila will delete them – Me not so much – I like the numbers of comments!!!!
The pictures on the clip was an added bonus! Give Boo and Colonel an ear tickle from me – I think Huskies are one of the most beautiful dogs…Along with Shepherds and Boxers…Okay, Boxers look as if they have a want about them but they crack me up. My mum and dad had one called Brandy and no matter what he did, I couldn’t get angry at him when he looked at me with a face more of character than intelligence!!!!
If you don’t know of Rainbow – Check them out. And if you want a laugh, check out Ritchie Blackmore’s take on a few of the biggest bands in the world. I love that he hated ‘Police’!!!!
HAH! Love your thoughts on Ass-Kissing. I have now walked out of three jobs because I wouldn’t bend over!! The last one being three weeks ago. Every fucker would only say ‘Yes’ I said ‘NO’ and was threatened with ‘Disciplinary!!’
I walked. I would rather go hungry than spend another second helping that cunt to put money in it’s till!!!!!
If you asked me if any of these principles done me any good, I would say ‘NAW!!!!!’ But I can look at myself in the mirror and admire my weight loss and the bruises that Gwen has given me!!!! (Only kidding! I couldn’t have done what I did without knowing she would say ‘You fucking idiot!!!!! But I know what you’re like!!!!!)
The Gun Laws in America is a debate I believe can be summed up with two contradicted ideas. First – The only way to stop a bad man with a gun is with a good man with a gun. Second as Scotland did, ban (hand) guns (I know you have a bigger problem of choice) But with what we are seeing now – Cars would also need to be banned!!!!
Best Scottish interaction I have ever heard. (If anyone is reading this, it may come across as a bit crude. But with what I’ve heard it is one hundred percent correct…Or an Urban Myth…Which I love!!! A guy at an Old Firm match walked up to a mounted Police woman and said, ‘Haw hen, your horse is sweatin” and she answered, ‘If you were between ma legs for three hours, you’d be sweatin’ tae!’
And lastly – Regarding Bruce…I reckon his work could be studied to eternity!!!!
Here is or maybe was (As I keep finding others) my favourite track.
Thanks as always my fine friend, you help lift the site into something special!!!
Hugh
But I found this a few weeks back!!
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Hi Hugh!
I’m with you on walking out of a bad job instead of staying and losing your pride! Matter of fact, my daughter just quit one last week seconds before they fired her, just like dear old dad! Rock on and bravo!
Thanks for the Bruce song! Awesome material…
Dale
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Hugh
I also wanted to highlight, laud and applaud your 9-part list of what to write about. It’s quite brilliant and pungent, and well worth pondering over and re-reading and thinking about in regard to one’s own work, and the work of others (both good and bad).
Thanks!
Dale
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Always a kind of refreshing blast from Cronland! All told, your pieces form a formidable corrective to the smug pieties that too often pass for morality.
Geraint
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Hi Geraint,
Thanks so much!!!
I love your line – All told, your pieces form a formidable corrective to the smug pieties that too often pass for morality.
I should get that printed on some T-Shirts and give them out to those that understand the way of the world…I don’t think I’d need that many!! An old (Pervy) teacher stated once – ‘How many times do we look and don’t see?’ Another legend of a teacher (Jim Gardner) said – This country is a democracy. We have freedom of speech. We can walk into the High Street of any city and stand on a soapbox and tell everyone our views!!! But who listens??
I’m finding a lot of quotes for T-Shirts! One of my favourites is (You need to have experience of cats) – Everything stops for an itch!!
This is one that I love but it is an anonymous quote – Please Let me be half the man that my dog believes me to be!
Not sure if I thought of this one or read it somewhere – Do the world a favour, fuck off and die!!
Actually I should get that tattooed on my fore-head. That would give me another T-Shirt – Don’t let me point to what is under my hat!!!
Thanks as always my fine friend – Much appreciated!!!!
Hugh
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Christopher –
Whenever I see “Hillary was right about everything” I respond that she and Biden signed off on the Iraq invasion. Viet Nam, The Middle East, and Afghanistan wars cost the US thousands of lives, huge material destruction, and improved nothing.
If someone had told me fifteen years ago the US would end up with a brainless evil, former reality show host I would said “OK, she has a dumb show with dumb people like Doctor Oz, but she’s not that bad, and it’s more of a talk show.”
Being old has its advantages. There are things I don’t want to live to see.
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Hugh, Great Springsteen clip! Thanks!
I wondering could ‘ a cow in thirteen letters’ possibly be a ‘Holstein cross’??
Good to read that LS remains healthy. bw mick
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Hi Mick,
Clever answer. I meant to do this on Monday but have lost a few days due to my birthday. And Amazon selling Black bottle thirteen quid cheaper than the supermarkets!! (£23 instead of £36 – Although Sainsburys has also started doing this. FYI – In Scotland you can save six quid a litre if you buy through Amazon for most drinks.)
Anyhow – The coo answer could also be fourteen letters!
See (Or sea) o (Or Oh – if you are going for the fourteen) double you.
The next one is simply queue!
And the third is Bookkeeper.
…Which I always fuck up as I want to say Beekeeper!!!
Thanks as always my fine friend – Hope all is well for you and your loved ones!!!!
Hugh
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Hugh
See-o-double-you. AAAAAAAAAArgh
Off to Sainsbury’s later then. thanks for the tip! mick
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