Literally Rerun – Walk on By by Jane Houghton

Literally Reruns – Walk on By by Jane Houghton

A steady accumulation of the little things can crush the will to go on. A chore once too often; the incessant pecking of the distorted past; a great fatigue, boredom. It’s seldom the big things that move you to check out–but usually the steady drone of dead sins, memories over-handled to the point of nonsense and tired feet that get you.

Jane Houghton explores such a situation in Walk on By. The blending of the present and past is expertly done here, and you find yourself caring for, and perhaps identifying with Margot.

Q: This could have easily gone sour if emotions were pushed. Yet it moves without being leaned into. A perfect example is her wondering if she should have kissed Ned goodbye in a casual manner. Was it difficult to place yourself in Margot’s mindset–with her recollections falling somewhat numbly on her present mind?

Q: Perhaps an odd question–but when I leave a story with an open ending (no matter how slightly ajar) I deliberately do not consider the possibilities in that universe’s future. I figure it’s up to the characters–did you (or do you) experience the same thing–meaning, are you absolutely certain what happened to Margot–or was there still a chance for a future?

Leila

Jane’s response:

Q1: This could have easily gone sour if emotions were pushed. Yet it moves without being leaned into. A perfect example is her wondering if she should have kissed Ned goodbye in a casual manner. Was it difficult to place yourself in Margot’s mindset–with her recollections falling somewhat numbly on her present mind?

A1: It wasn’t difficult to place myself in Margot’s mindset. I grew to love her as I wrote her into existence; I didn’t want to hurt her, didn’t want her to suffer more than she already had, and so I tried not to overstate and overplay emotions. I tried to say ‘just enough’. Given that I felt such a connection with her, slipping into her mindset felt natural – not effortless, but not forced, either.

Q2: Perhaps an odd question–but when I leave a story with an open ending (no matter how slightly ajar) I deliberately do not consider the possibilities in that universe’s future. I figure it’s up to the characters–did you (or do you) experience the same thing–meaning, are you absolutely certain what happened to Margot–or was there still a chance for a future?

A2: I do experience the same thing – and this was definitely the case with Margot. Again, as with Answer One, this was me trying not to overstate emotions, trying not to force actions. Trying to say ‘just enough’. I hope, with every fibre of my being, that Margot was able to find a strand of life to hold on to. But, if she did decide to remove herself from this rotating rock, then I forgive her; indeed, no forgiveness is necessary. She is strong and courageous and she has endured some serious shizzle in her life – the decision is hers, and hers alone, to make. So many people tried to quash her power, stifle her ability to choose. Her rapist. Her shizzle-bag producer. Her mother-aunt. I will not join their ranks. She is free, and I trust that she made the right decision for her.

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Walk on By