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520: Don’t Touch that Dial, More Words From the TV Generation

ireneallison12

In Stephen King’s On Writing he mentions that he is among the last generation of writers who learned to read and write before television became a staple of American life (as I’m sure was the same in other developed nations as well).

I’m twelve years younger than King, so I guess I must be in the first generation who watched television as we learned our ABC’s. TV may have very well rotted my brain before I really needed to use it, but I do not regret the experience. It was a tremendous boost to my imagination and cut down on unwanted conversation with my family (which, like TV, featured a new cast of characters–or guest star step fathers, siblings and cousins on a frequent basis). Weekends were the best. If you could hang in there, Nightmare Theatre would be on Channel 7 after the late news.

Then Saturday. I was a traditionalist cartoon wise, while my brother preferred stupid crap like Jonny Quest and Frankenstein Junior. I disliked almost every cartoon that had real looking people in them, stuff like Spiderman and Dick Tracy did not appeal to me. You could come no closer than Fred Flintstone as a human figure by my standard.

The Looney Toons hour was the acme of my weekend, but I also enjoyed The Wacky Racers. Then there were The Mighty Heroes (see the clip at the end). Then at night there were sitcoms that were little more than live action toons. On some level I understood that The Beverly Hillbillies, Gilligan’s Island and The Brady Bunch (and there were many many others of the same stripe) were stupid as hell–but I remember them all clearly. Even sixty years later, when Me TV is on, I will recognize Jethro Bodine in his “double-naught spy” get up–including his steel hat and recall where I was when I first saw it. And his sister “Jethrine” might have been the ugliest drag job ever.

And there are two programs from the late sixties whose episodes I have memorized. Show me ten seconds of any part of any episode of either show and I will tell you what it is about. These shows are Dragnet (the first “rebooted series” I know of) and Star Trek.

Both went into immediate syndication and the one channel we could always get in no matter where we lived was Channel 11. KTSW ran both shows late in the afternoon Monday through Friday. Two episodes of the half hour Dragnet followed by one hour long Star Trek.

Dragnet is an act all its own. A mixture of public service and high camp that has never been surpassed (a sort of in earnest version of Batman). My favorite episode involved “Mr. Daniel Loomis” who was so mean that he stole everything from a blind woman’s house including her white cane. And I still adore it when “Sgt. Joe Friday” (Jack Webb, the star, director, writer, producer of the show) gave one of his “speeches” to evil doers and fellow cops. The thing is a masterpiece.

Everyone knows about Star Trek. My favorite episodes co-starred William Windom and something like a giant laser shooting baseball bat and the one the away team ages after visiting the surface of a planet–except Chekov, because he got scared.

And yet, despite the familiarity, there were special events such as The Wizard of Oz being aired only on Easter Sunday, and when the Saturday Night Movie was War of the Worlds. When I reached my teens, music took over my imagination, yet I fondly recall all those hours spent rotting my brain on stuff like Super Chicken.

Cartoons can keep giving in new ways. I recently realized that Charles Bukowski and Snagglepuss have the same diction. Not the same voices of course, but similar timing. Bukowski often elongated the key word in a line when he recited. Snagglepuss always did that, but with the caveat “dontcha know.” Buk: “Degraded by this.” Snag: “Degraded by thisss…dontcha know.” I listen to Bukowski’s readings and long to hear just one “Dontcha know.” Would someone who spent Saturday morning doing her homework be able to make this bizarre claim? I think not…. Dontcha know.

So I heartily claim that anything that fires the imagination is good for you (unless you are a sick fucker and can imagine only sick fucker stuff). And although a person should grow culturally as she moves through life, I do not see any reason why anyone shouldn’t have room enough in her heart for both Hamlet and the wonder Pig, “Arnold Ziffle,” of Green Acres. I am proud to have been born into a TV world. It beat dealing with temporary step siblings whose names I rarely committed to memory.

Now on to an elevated topic:

For a time out of memory, The Week That Is was not dominated by first time contributors. Three fine returnees, a welcomed new friend and one permanent vagrant made up the queue.

We also had a top notch rerun on Sunday, with Loredano Cafaro’s The Maker of Creches–please check it out if you haven’t yet. It is a wowser, as we used to say at home.

The vag, yours truly, opened the show Monday with Mannish. Ah the paradox of life, we long to be older when we are children and vice versa. Yet both directions contain their fair shares of pain and unpleasantness. Still, young people have better internal organs and plenty of fresh brain cells to dispose of, but their hangovers are much worse. In poker that is called a “push.”

Rehanal Hoque is our lone debut writer this week. The Silence is brief but it hits hard. The despair is measured and conveyed perfectly as is the staggering numbness of the MC. We certainly want to see more from Rehanal.

Alex Kellett had his second winner with Tip Run on Wednesday. Anything can happen when the writing is good. Alex proves this true with a sad tale of self examination while undertaking what is normally a mundane task. The information slowly gathers into a truly heartbreaking picture.

Thursday brought us Dimps by the extremely witty Geraint Jonathan. It seems off-key that our world should shun smokers on account of health reasons and yet at the same time push for the legalization of pot (which does no favors for the lungs) and offer burgers that will give you the cardiovascular system of the Pillsbury Doughboy. Ah yes, cigarettes are a scapegoat; you can’t smoke in pubs because it interferes with the pint curls of the healthier patrons. Here, Geraint shows a wonderful little business undertaken by people who find their product on the ground, similar to farming, if you will. The voice is perfect and it speaks deftly of a society perhaps rotten to the filter.

Blood Lovers is Gerald Coleman at his best. It sinks back sixty years into reality, it does not affect an air of nostalgia, but it is alive in his writing as it was then. Doing coming of age pieces requires taste and restraint, and Gerald struck it perfectly. He draws pathos from simply telling the truth. Nobody is crazier than a thirteen-year-old, and making that world come alive once again takes special insight, as seen plenty in this writer. And it was the perfect fit for Valentines Day.

Well, here we are. The long and the short, the I remember thats and what the fucks that continue to keep good stories stories good. And as long as that happens we will do our best to provide you with more.

I close with yet another TV show list; ten programs I recall fondly, not so much for what they were, but when they were (Since Dragnet, toons and Star Trek have already been mentioned, I will omit them). Please, as always, add your own!

  • Gunsmoke (not big on westerns but that was in my life from birth until I was in High School).
  • My Three Sons (I did not know that there were five earlier years of the show that had aired in black and white on another network co-starring William Frawley and a different oldest son in it until I was an adult).
  • The Dick Van Dyke Show (Fountain of Youth. Carl Reiner and Rose Marie lived well into their nineties and Dick, at the time of this writing, is still alive and “dicking” at 99)
  • Bewitched (it was on Thursday nights and signalled the arrival of Friday)
  • The Virginian (still not big on westerns but it had very cool theme music)
  • Hawaii Five-O (talk about another great theme)
  • Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom (poor Jim getting thrashed by a jungle beast while Marlon watched from the jeep)
  • The Wonderful World of Disney
  • The Twilight Zone
  • All yours

Leila

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Published by ireneallison12

46 thoughts on “520: Don’t Touch that Dial, More Words From the TV Generation”

  1. I am impressed by your memory as ever. a fun and entertaining read. We were very late to the game as far as television because my dad valued conversation and reading and just said no for a long time. He did love the cinema and cartoons but he never really got on with cartoons on the television very much. I am not a huge fan, though once we did have a set I enjoyed Popeye, every one I spent hoping that the little spinach army would march up his arm. When I was very young we used to be taken to my granparents on Sunday for a roast dinner, a bath (we didn’t have hot water or indeed a bath except for the metal one brought up from the cellar and filled with a bucket of water heated in the wash boiler. But then we watched Champion the Wonder Horse. I loved that one. Only that and then it was turned off.

    I quite liked the early Star Trek but I was totally in love with Dr Kildare (Richard Chamberlin) but really I can’t remember any others though I still think about Flash Gordon at the Saturday Matinee at the ‘pictures’ and the wonderful way his certain death was not certain any more after a week away.

    We have so many programmes now but to be honest I believe the majority are trash and so called ‘Reality Shows’ are turning brains into pumice. Heigh ho – I think that might be me showing how many times I’ve been around the sun. 🙂 Thanks Leila – dd

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  2. Hi Diane

    I remember Sunday bathes intended to last the school week. If I didn’t do a good job I was sent back in. The first shower nozzle I met was when I was twelve, at Jr. High.

    Loved the weird voices on Popeye. Especially Wimpy. You’re Dad was right. The tube does suck everything in and only lets dumb bottom feeder celebs out. I stopped watching it for any real amount of time about fifteen years ago, which, not coincidentally, improved my slim writing and reading skills.

    thank you!

    Leila

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  3. Hi Leila
    Those were the days… the old step dad screaming, “Turn those cartoons down!” I’m thinking, who is this big son of a bitch in my Dad’s house?
    Loved the Acme bunch… The “Meep, Meep” or maybe it was, “Beep, Beep” of The Roadrunner. Can’t forget Wile E. Coyote and Sam. My thing besides Star Trek was the Wild Wild West with Robert Conrad. Reruns I think.
    I liked how you started with SK “On Writing” that drew me in like cheese and crackers.
    Enjoyed your post, took me back, fo sho.
    Christopher

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    1. Hi Christopher
      Just happen to be on my computer. I remember the Wild Wild West–such a strange show, a precursor to Steam Punk.
      I always rooted for Wile E even though it always went wrong. An I recall the Sheep Dog and Wolf who punched a time clock first!
      Yes, the King book is a classic of its kind!
      Leila

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      3. Yep lol! That was the first thing I thought of… I think I’m with you on liking the Bugs Bunny/Road Runner cartoons better than the Dick Tracy–people, types… Hadn’t thought of it like that.
        The original Batman was awful damn goofy but I did watch it– every time they were dying in a huge vat of green nuclear waste or something. lol

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      4. Check out “Tune In With Tooney” with Bill the cartoon curator and the Tuna. I keep hoping Tuney will sing “Aquarium” to the tune of “Aquarius”. 1951 (I think) was a big year in my life. Appendectomy at eight years old which I didn’t find out about until I was out of the hospital and TV came to sleepy Portland after arriving in more sophisticated Seattle. Segue – I miss Tom Robbins, read most of his novels if not all. For a few years I received his Twits.
        Biggies for me “Cecil The Seasick Sea Serpent” and “Rocky And Bullwinkle”.
        Roadrunner competes with Perry Mason and Hallmark Movies for the least originality.
        I miss cartoons and movietones (I think I have that wrong – it was news before you got news on TV) at movies which I rarely attend anymore with streaming at home and captions for my aged and diminished hearing.
        Have read most Stephen King, but stories are too long. The books could be cut in half and not miss much.
        What you need to know about Star Trek and Star Wars (I’ve prolly mentioned this before – memory impaired by neuralizers). https://medium.com/the-haven/space-opera-1f7bdd5e26aa
        Couldn’t figure out comments so I piggybacked with a reply.

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  4. Born and raised on the wrong side of the pond, my childhood tv viewing was pretty staid. Top Cat, voiced by Phil Silvers, didn’t arrive on UK tv til my mid-teens and Star Trek didn’t appear til my late teens. Fortunately, there was the cinema. In particular, there were the kids’ Saturday Morning Matinees with loads of American cartoons for sixpence, with the bonus of vigorous audience participation (so vigorous that the management frequently stopped the show). The only drawback was that I had to take my kid brother along, but nevertheless God Bless America.
    Great post, thanks for the cartoon memories, Leila. My vote for another memorable tv series, Wyatt Earp.

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    1. Hi Mick

      The weekend movies were a great thing when we lived in town. Every year the school sold tickets for kids to go to a movie a week for next to nothing. I clearly remember seeing Around the World in Eighy Days.
      Top Cat was a classic. It actually ran at night here when first released.
      Thanks again!
      Leila

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  6. Ah, you bring back so many fond memories, Leila.  I’d add Alfred Hitchcock to the list. We watch it now. The half-hour episodes are better than the hour-long ones. We try to watch the original Twilight Zone, but our streaming service always crashes. (Maybe the show is haunted?) As for cartoons, Audie Doggy & Doggy Daddy come to mind. Also the one with the Wayback Machine…. Now it’s time for me to exit stage left. 

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    1. Hi David
      Hitchcock is and still is a fine show. I am glad it never left black and white. There was a Brit actor named (I think) John Anderson who was always on it as a detective or sophisticated bad guy.
      Thank you again!
      Leila

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  7. Liela
    Perhaps I was five when my own TV shows came into my life. I remember waking just after dawn on Saturday mornings to watch The Modern Farmer. Television was such a novelty, here I was a child in NYC watching guys in Nebraska showing us how to protect the crops from the frost. What could I possibly learn? Or from Howdy Doody or Capt. Kangaroo? I know I learned love early on The Mickey Mouse Club by the sight of Annette and a ravishing 12-year-old Karla. I guess my desires were always modest.
    And thanks for your kind words. Did you notice both of the main characters in our stories this week were 13? Maybe there is a time early on when everything pivots, not that it ever gets easier. There is just this radical switch, where everything starts to change and it has nothing to do with hormones and maturity — a real soul change happens. Maybe it’s just us. — Gerry

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  8. Leila
    Two shows I was fascinated with which I don’t believe you mentioned were The Three Stooges and Gilligan’s Island. Gilligan’s Island – the desert island situation was enthralling, and the women were beautiful. The Three Stooges – some of the sets and situations were creepy as hell. At the same time, I do remember getting bored sometimes as I felt my brain being sucked in by the eternal Tube, which wasn’t eternal back then as I remember sitting there watching it go off the air waves late at night in Detroit Michigan and wondering how the hell could this happen, why would they put up nothing but a blank screen all night long? In that respect I was a part of what was coming just as much as anyone else, which was, as I believe Springsteen and/or Dire Straights put it, a million zillion channels and nothing’s on…(I would often get up at night after my parents went to bed and do things like try to watch tv while they were sleeping. At the age of 9 or so this evolved into leaving the house, sometimes through the window, and wandering the streets with my less-than-savory friends.)
    How the Grinch Stole Christmas and Snoopy at Christmas….those are etched into my brain pan for the duration. Frosty the Snowman too. I literally wept when he melted.
    My mother was a revolutionary who started trying to limit my tv time very early and I remember making bargains with her saying I will do this many chores if I can watch this many more hours of tv PLEASE, etc., which is hilarious in retrospect because “chores” have never been my specialty and I’ve always been considered by a vast swath of the people who “knew” me to be the laziest human being they’ve ever encountered (laying around while reading books all day and night (while also being officially unemployed) is one of my favorite pastimes that is frowned upon by the puritan American mainstream)…
    Your memory is Proustian, Leila! Proust laying there in bed hiding away alone with his books and his endless cigarettes dipped in opium conjuring up the past ain’t got nothing on the way you can conjure up days gone by!
    “D”
    PS, I also remember seeing people like David Bowie on tv 1970s…And John and Yoko on Dick Cavett…

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    1. Hi Dale
      Yes, I recall Frosty as well as the Grinch. Always a little sad at the end.
      Your mom sounds like mine. If it was nice out we had a choice go out and play or get the hell out NOW!
      Those darn radio grower uppers never understood.
      It’s amazing what we remember. I can recite the Wally Gator theme with much more confidence than I have in remembering the pledge of allegiance.
      Looking forward to your next Sunday appearance tomorrow!
      Leila

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      1. Leila – I listened to mother’s soaps on radio my first few years. I remember drawing on the underside of the ironing boards probably during some of the shows. Gunsmoke, Our Gal Sunday (girl from Colorado or something), Ma Perkins, Fibber McGee and Molly, Amos and Andy

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      3. Leila
        Right now (as we speak) there are two true genius talkers all over You Tube that I know of and would like to throw a word in for. A. Cornell West. B. Chris Hedges. Geniuses!
        In one speech C. West gave, he referenced Chekhov, DH Lawrence, J Joyce, Melville, Ida B. Wells, Sojourner Truth, Toni Morrison, Nietzsche, Kierkegaard, Socrates, Buddha and Jesus in one breath. Always wrapped in the same black clothes like a genius. Chris Hedges also a (flawed) genius (“any final words?” “the soul is real”). Anything by either of them on You Tube = genius, even when they’re not at their best. One can also watch tons of James Baldwin “live” on You Tube, which is like = black Melville, all you have to do is look at Baldwin, his mind is on fire.
        Cornell West = best living lecturer on American literature (by far) and coming out of the black prophetic tradition, man is this man good and a Good Man. He should be president, in a better world he will be or someone like him! Intense!
        D

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  9. PS,
    Leila
    Something ate part of my last answer but I also want to mention these mythical figures of multiple iterations who appeared on the small screen (sometimes in shows and sometimes from large screen productions being played there) and had a massive impact on my personality I do believe…again, coming straight from the small screen and entering my brain for years hardly with me even knowing it was doing it and yet now all these will be in there forever until “it” no longer is and maybe even after…
    The Cowboy. The Indian. The Horse. The Detective. The Criminal. The Vampire. The Astronaut or Spaceman (or person). The Lady of the Evening. The Femme Fatale. The Rock Star. The Christ Figure. The Devil. The Reformed Lady of the Evening. The Regretful Femme Fatale who changes her mind. The Cigarette. That last one was everywhere and led me to a 25-year two-pack-a-day (sometimes more, sometimes less) Marlboro habit which took years of nicotine patches and nicotine gum (simultaneously) to get over it (after do-it-or-die became the only option). (And I agree that it’s utterly ridiculous and scandalous for the Gov’ment to make Laws about smoking in bars. If you can’t handle cig smoke in bars, F— Off, so to speak.) Also The Car. Like with The Cigarette, a fascination with The Road Trip and The Car probably also began (I now see in retrospect) at least partly with the small screen. Later it was the actual books of Kerouac, before that it was the impact he had on the small screen with no one even knowing how to determine how profound the impact really was. (See him on Buckley’s show as an example of The Intoxicated Genius being mocked, spit on, and isolated in public, a TV crucifixion if there ever was one.)
    THANK YOU, LEILA!
    DWB
    PPS, Oscar the Grouch raging from a trash can and a Frog who can play the banjo and sing, also a Yellow Bird as tall as a Giraffe! Totally cool! (back then…)

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  10. Hi again Dale!

    I did enjoy watching Buckley’s show. He did bring on interesting people. But I swear, in his mind, he was NEVER wrong. I recall him almost getting into it with Vidal or maybe it was Mailor. For a self proclaimed intellectual he did bait people.

    Leila

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    1. L
      I believe Mailer desired to wipe the floor with Buckley (Mailer was as radical as the Beats, and oftentimes, more so); but Buckley was at least a true conservative and I believe you’re right, he was willing to let other ideas have their genuine say…He always thought he was right, but he appreciated a challenging dialogue and appeared to somehow like and be fond of folks like A. Ginsberg even though he believed they were “mad”….Ginsberg, Mailer, Kerouac, Buckley on mainstream American TV today? Never!! And sad!!
      D

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      1. Dale
        TV talk has disintegrated. Bill Maher is sometimes interesting, but too often has too many people on who say the same things.
        Buckley was never dull (but he regetted losing his cool and calling Vidal a “faggot”); Christopher Hitchens was interesting also.
        Leila

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  12. As enjoyable & illuminating as ever, not a line that doesn’t ZING. And yes: “Anything that fires the imagination is good for you.” Room enough indeed for Hamlet & the wonder Pig, Schubert & The Sex Pistols, Dostoevsky & Batman, & dare I say it Homer & The Simpsons. Some of those programmes mentioned bring back their own little worlds. I don’t have a TV but am certainly of the TV Generation. I’d add to the list: Land of the Giants, Flashing Blade, The Red Gauntlet, Tarzan (Ron Ely-style) & The Adventures of Robinson Crusoe – the theme music to which could still leave me awash with sentimentality. Ditto Bonanza. Whereas The Munsters & The Addams Family are forever associated with drear Sundays in chapel (the Welsh & gloomy kind) & the race to get home to catch the last half of said programmes. And good grief, yes, Dr Kildare. My grandmother, who often seemed to have trouble distinguishing between make-believe & reality, dearly wished me to one day BE Dr Kildare – with the added prospect of my later turning into Val Doonican. That I became neither is both here & there. The Virginian I associate with the desire not to wear socks – as I was sure the Virginian himself did not wear them; I was assured by my stepmother that the Virginian did, in fact, wear socks. So there we go. Odd the Proustian dive one takes. Great stuff Leila, as always.
    Geraint

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    1. Hi Geraint
      I appreciate your reply and compliments! Ye God’s, The Land of the Giants. My brother and I went to war about that one. I thought it was stupid (like most of his shows were) and it was on at the same time as Disney on Sunday.
      I got outvoted and had to watch the crappy b and w portable in the kitchen. Still says it was dumb, not Lost in Space dumb, not even Gilligan was that dumb…
      Oops, I regress.
      Thank you again!
      Leila

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  13. Many years ago I found what I decided was a flattened roadrunner in Eastern Oregon. To make it more interesting, I imagined it was run over by a Plymouth Roadrunner, or at least a Mustang, Cougar, or Impala. For those outside North America, those were car names at the time, all of which are defunct except for the Mustang.

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  14. Great post and great week of writing. Star Trek played a big role in our house growing up, not because we loved it, but my father did and that meant the house had to be in silence when it was on. One time in the early 90s my dad was working overtime and both my brother and I happened to be at home when my dad called to ask us to record it on the VHS as he would be home later. We only realised half an hour late we’d forgot to do so, and such was our fear of his ire that we both went to the pub to avoid his arrival home – we were 29 and 20 years old respectively at the time!

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    1. Paul
      That’s another factor that TV and music have in our lives. They are not only able to bring back the good times, but the other kind of times as well.
      Whenever I hear the theme to “Love American Style” I recall the ugliness of Friday nights that would happen in the living room when “they” got home later.
      Excellent observation!
      Leila

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  15. Hi Leila,

    So sorry that I’m a mile behind!!!

    I’ll try not to let it happen again!!!

    …But can’t promise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I loved Star Trek and still watch it. I love William Shatner’s understated acting technique!!!

    I have a few favourites, I liked the one with Mr Lincoln, Joan Collins, David Soul but probably due to the stunning and wonderful ‘Terri Garr’ I’d go for that one, ‘Assignment Earth’

    Man, she was brilliantly cast in ‘Friends’ as Phoebe’s Mother – But you Know what I’m going to say –

    ‘What Knockers’ ‘Well thank you Doctor’

    ‘Elevate me’

    ‘What here, now!!’

    ‘He’d have an enoromous shvanschtuker…Woof!’

    I need to watch that again for about the 176th time!!!!!

    And your list – I’m not a great TV fan. I did have a liking for ‘The Sweeny’, ‘Starsky And Hutch’ and ‘The Professionals’ but again, I’ve mentioned this so many times, The American comedy spoof ‘Soap’ was as good as I’ve ever seen!!

    All the very best.

    Hugh

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    1. Hello Hugh
      On Late Night With David Letterman in the 80’s, Dave obviously had a crush on Terri who would appear on the show once a month or so.
      She was highly amusing and somewhat bemused by him. My brother watched Starsky and Hutch and also The Dukes of Hazzard (for the only reason guts watched it, and it wasn’t the car).
      Take care
      Leila

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