Week 400 – 400 Weeks, Halloween And A Hospital Visit.

Here we are at Week 400. I’m quite sure I’ll use that number a few times throughout this post.

I honestly can’t believe that we’ve reached this amount of weeks of publication!

It’s just a pity that the hundreds and the anniversary don’t tie in, I think it did on our second year but then dates and weeks and holidays buggered everything up. Our 8^th year anniversary will be in a few week’s time, Week 403 on the 19^th November.

So this post even though it is a special one, will simply be more of the same.

However, I would like to say a quick thanks from all of us to all of you who have helped keep us going for 400 weeks – Did I mention that before??

I had a look to see if there were any mental facts about the number four hundred but there was nothing of interest. The bible has quite a few references but it’s mainly about bodies of men being on the four hundred mark. Don’t know what that means, maybe in those days due to the dinosaurs eating the Egyptians, there weren’t that many people on the planet so if you had an army of four hundred, you had what was deemed to be quite a lot. (Well I was talking about the bible so I thought I’d also start making shit up!)

I then wondered since it is Halloween on Monday whether that had anything to do with 400…It hasn’t.

Although I’m quite sure there is a Kirk somewhere that is responsible for burning 400 perfectly innocent ladies.

The only credible thing I can tie into our 400^th Saturday Posting is, it’s a fucking lot!!

I hate to blame our American friends for anything (We have enough problems this side of the water) but I do think the fascination with Halloween came from them. At one time all we had to do was buy a pound of monkey nuts, a couple of satsumas and a pomegranate for the weird kid (He liked to play with the wee beastie) and we were raring to go. But now we have to buy kids’ costumes, fun packs, pet costumes, garden ornaments, adult costumes, ornaments, mechanical things that pop up etc, etc. It’s getting to be just about as expensive as Christmas. The supermarkets are rubbing their greedy little paws and selling shite a plenty.

It’s the falseness of it that I can’t stand. If a kid truly wants to be scared, let them spend a night in either Savile or Jackson’s haunted house! Mind you, it would be a lot scarier if they were still alive!

Oh and this is the first Halloween that her fae the big house is dead. I need to change the ending to the joke about the queen thinking the world smells of paint as there is always one wee Council worker slapping on the emulsion as she walks towards. The ending now reads, ‘The queen thinks that the whole world smells of soil.

But kiddies if you are out on All Hallows Eve and you do think you are encountering the un-holy, remember, you can always seek refuge at the priest’s house!

Okay onto this week’s stories.

We had three new folks who we welcome with open minds, a returner and one writer who we have enjoyed working with immensely.

As always, our initial comments follow.

First up was ‘Cold‘ by Mason Koa.

This was Mason’s first outing for us and he is the only person who if he keeps at it, he may surpass Tom! He has time on his side.

‘Very well done!’

‘I am impressed, really impressed.’

‘Mason shows that sensitivity and perception that no-one can teach you.’

The lady who was next up is a writer who has shown each and every time, how hard she is willing to work at her craft. ‘Hen And Chicks.’ was Rachel Siever’s 8th story for us.

‘Excellent idea about control!’

‘Two more stories for double figures. It isn’t, ‘If, it’s ‘When?’

‘Rachel continues to send us interesting work.’

Vince Barry was our second new writer, we wish him well and we hope to see more of his work.

‘Rachel, Remarque And The Maltese Falcon‘ was published on Wednesday.

‘A fine piece of writing.’

‘A different take from the usual dementia stories.’

‘An accomplished piece of writing.’

Our next new writer, Frank Jamison nearly finished off the week with, ‘The Violin‘

‘Lyrical.’

‘There’s a tension going through this!’

‘Wonderful tone.’

And to finish off the week we had Rati Pednekar with ‘Relief‘.

‘It took looking at this closely to get the full import of it!

‘A bit different.’

‘Some nice remarks about the servant.’

Well, that’s our 400^th posting (Did I mention that??) rounded up.

And for what seems literally the millionth time (A nod to ‘The Big Bang Theory’) I will ask as many folks as possible to send our writers a wee comment.

I think Leila has advised you all over the last two weeks about The Sunday Re-Run.

I tried to find a joke using the number 400 but there are none but then I remembered the legend that was Rikki Fulton. I’m sure he will forgive me for changing his joke slightly.

A man walks into a bar and sees his friend steaming drunk.

He says, ‘I thought you were drinking low alcohol lager’

The friend answered, ‘Ah wis’

‘How many have you had?’

‘Four hundred!’

(The actual number was 147 but what the hell, 400 works!)

A nod to Leila and her LOL (Love of lists) I was wondering about spooky music since tomorrow is paedo fetish night. Now there are only five. Four I love and one I honestly do find a tad unsettling.

1. The Clown Song by DJ Rankin (Brilliant!)

2. House of 1000 Corpses by Rob Zombie (Even more brilliant!!)

3. Where The Wild Roses Grow -Nick Cave and Kylie Minogue (Beautifully eerie)

4. Last Dance With Mary Jane – Tom Petty (Normally anything about necrophilia is dead boring, but the video is deliciously sick)

5. Take your pick from the whole soundtrack to the first original ‘Omen’ film – That is as eerie as the fucking wean!!!

I’d be interested to hear if there are any mainstream songs that for whatever reason makes your flesh crawl. (No Bieber – That’s a given!)

Just to finish.

As I mentioned Deid lizzie, I thought I’d share the best joke that I’ve heard about the queen. If you have seen this, it’s worth watching again and if you haven’t, you’re in for a treat!!

I give you Mr Billy Connolly at the top of his game.

Hugh