The rapids collided with rocks in the water and the moss was warm. The logs formed a nest in the river and a piece of bark rushed by. From the treetops the sharp vision of the falcon saw the ant which carried a pine needle, the inside of a falling cone and the white paws of a wood mouse. Three moments later the falcon sailed home with the prey, in the evening sun.
“Now that I’ve got you here, would you…” A stick crunched under my feet. “Would you mind giving me an answer?”
She grazed the smooth surface of a tall spruce. Her index finger touched a stream of resin. “Take a deep breath with me.”
Her ribs became visible above her top and as we both drew in the forest paused in complete silence. Nature filters oxygen into purity and somehow things seem clearer under a forest sky. The green of the spruces turned deep blue as the sun set, but I closed my eyes and held the memory of the green to myself.
“We are young. And we barely know each other.” The dryness in her voice barely bore the words. “John. We barely know each other.”
The wind whistled between branches and moved fallen cones, pine needles, bark. The creek rippled behind us but another sound stood out. The calmness of her breathing was lost.
“I should have picked a better spot.”
“It’s not the spot.”
She took a step closer and her eyes were moist. The red dress she wore was grey under the dark blue sky. I held her.
“Yes it is. We can barely see the sun set from here. The colours of the shadows don’t do justice to nature. Did you know” I looked at her and ran my hand down her side. We both followed my hand to her hand. “The colour red is the longest colour. It’s why it’s the last colour we’ll see out of a sunset.”
“That’s not why I wore it. I’m not like you. There’s not purpose in everything I do.”
An owl hooted from a distance.
“Have you made up your mind or do you still have doubts?”
“Of course I doubt. It’s life. Please John. Can we talk about something else?”
She fell into my arms again. “Yes sure. I’m guessing you know why I took you here.” She nodded and held me closer. “Did you hear the owl just now? No. Okay maybe we’ll hear it again. It hunts at night. The falcon and the eagle are better hunters and since they compete for the same food the owl is nocturnal. Isn’t that something? When the last rays of the sun turn red, the owl wakes up.”
We stood there and listened. I could still remember the green of the branches. The creek was audible and helped me fill the picture of Sophie in the passing afternoon.
“Your brother has children right?”
“Yes two. Isaac and Gabriel.”
“Do you think” Her voice dried up again and she restarted the sentence. “Can I meet them?”
“Yes sure. Gabriel is only seven weeks old, but Isaac is three.”
“That’s too bad.” She sighed and looked around at the colourless forest. “I would have loved to have taken them here.”
“We can take Isaac, but he can’t walk for too long. It’s quite a long walk from the car.”
She nodded and took a deep breath. The spruce responded to the winds while the owl was heard again. She turned around and smiled. Her smile was more genuine, purer than before and she kissed my cheek. “John, you’re great. I really mean it. You’re going to”
She paused midsentence. Her eyes were fixed in the distance.
I took her hand and we started walking back to the car. “Want to hear about the wonder of nature again?”
“Yes.”
“The moss is able to grow without roots so the only nutrition it gets is from the air. The colour of the moss is a good way to tell if the air is pure.”
“But it’s so dark you can’t tell.”
“Another way is to feel it. Take another deep breath. Did the air feel pure?”
“Very.”
“Are you ready to talk about keeping our child?”
“Yes…”
literally stories 
Hi Tobias, I think you have achieved an interesting approach to a moment in a new relationship. A ‘young’ couple find a space in nature to be alone to discuss a private problem, we the reader are not privileged to know them intimately or how they resolve the issue at the end. What I saw was the build up to the awkwardness, the clever use of words to cloak and skip around their emotions. The idea that colours are mere shadows to them give a melancholy tone and the openness of the wilderness perhaps indicates their subconscious search for space and release from facing up to each other and the ‘problem’. We don’t really know which way this will end. I enjoyed the background use of natural events and sights in this and found it a good read.
James.
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Thank you, James. You are a great reader! A dream reader for me as a writer. Your comment makes me so happy. Your observations are spot on and I am very thankful for your kind words. I battled given this a happy ending, but didn’t think she would just agree with him and keep the child. So as you say, we don’t really know what happened. I see it as a small victory for John or if you allow the pun: as a baby step.
ATVB my friend
Tobias
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A beautiful story, Tobias. When she says “You’re going to …” her decision has been made with the four words she left out. Maybe only women get that instantly. A lovely, happy story. June
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Thanks for saying such kind words, June. I’m glad you enjoyed it. I think nature is a great theme and also a beautiful theme. A young couple deciding to have a baby and the complication of the decision could be mirrored in nature, I thought. In nature, life is cruel, but also beautiful.
ATVB my friend
Tobias
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Hi Tobias. This was a rich tapestry of sound, vision and suspense. You did a good job in reproducing the doubts and hesitancies that would have plagued their minds. Nature became a distraction, but also provided a focus to see deeply inside themselves. Wonderful work. Well done. Des
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Thank you, Des! I originally wrote this as a poem or perhaps poem-prose is a better word to describe it. I added words and dialogue to not make it so lyrical and I think the end product turned out okay. The complexity of nature provides a background to the complexity of their life decision. Will they give life or not? She is obviously more concerned, but in the end I think she’s leaning towards keeping the child.
Thanks once again for your very kind words, Des.
ATVB my friend
Tobias
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Reblogged this on Tobias Haglund.
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Hi Tobias, this shows what a versatile writer that you are. You crafted your story together with just the right amount of description and an empathy towards the dilemma.
All the very best my friend.
Hugh
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Thank you Hugh. I think the problem(like there is only one!) I have is translating the tone/language from writing non-comedy stories into English. Not that I first wrote this story in Swedish, but there is a different tone to reach in these types of stories compared to comedy. This one started as a simple poem in Swedish, but other than that there is no Swedish equivalent story to this one. It was fun and I wanted to challenge myself and write a story with a main character not exactly as myself. Thanks for your kind words!
ATVB my friend
Tobias
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